5 Principles for “Newbie” Youth Pastors- PART II

Posted on: 08/13/12 3:01 AM | by Jonathan McKee

Last week I asked you to chime in with your advice for my friend “Neal Newbie,” a brand new youth pastor. You all shared some amazing insight. In the next post, I finally chimed in with my two cents, raising the question, “How should a brand new youth pastor begin his or her job in ministry?” I suggested there were 5 principles to consider. If you haven’t read that post—make sure you go back and read that first principle. Today I continue my list:

NOTE: Today’s post is riddled with helpful links to articles and resources that expand on the topic. I think you’ll enjoy them.

2.    Start with People… not Program

This principle has a lot of crossover with the first principle I shared, but it deserves specific attention.

Effective youth ministry isn’t about dodgeball, pizza and all-nighters. Don’t get me wrong, I use all of these tools (and find them effective)… but they are just tools. And they definitely shouldn’t be the focus of any ministry.

Ministry begins with Continue reading “5 Principles for “Newbie” Youth Pastors- PART II”

5 Principles for “Newbie” Youth Pastors

Posted on: 08/9/12 3:01 AM | by Jonathan McKee

How should a brand new youth pastor begin his or her job in ministry?

A couple days ago I asked for your advice for my friend “Neal Newbie,” a brand new youth pastor in a small church with just two teenagers currently attending Sunday School. What would you tell this guy? How does a youth worker know where he or she is supposed to start?

I think many youth workers might immediately start a midweek program. Others might start going on nearby campuses. Some might just assume fetal position, shivering in the corner of their office in hopes that the senior pastor never checks on them!!!

So where should my friend “Neal Newbie” start? Continue reading “5 Principles for “Newbie” Youth Pastors”

What Would You Advise Neal Newbie?

Posted on: 08/7/12 3:01 AM | by Jonathan McKee

I have a friend who just started a job as a youth pastor for a small town church. When the church hired him, they were emphatic about two “vital” elements:

  1. Don’t change the room.
  2. Make sure you let the pastor know what’s going on.

So much to say… I don’t even know where to start.

I’ll go ahead and refrain from ranting, “Seriously? That’s all you require!!!” …skipping to the more intriguing subject matter. The fact is, my friend “Neal Newbie” hasn’t ever worked in youth ministry before, so this is his first crack at it. He met with me last week and basically asked me, “Where do I start?” Continue reading “What Would You Advise Neal Newbie?”

Daddy… Notice Me

Posted on: 06/20/12 1:10 PM | by Jonathan McKee

Last Sunday, on Father’s Day, I preached 4 services at a local church here in the Sacramento area. I gave a new talk for dads titled, “Daddy… Notice Me.”

My typical routine is to manuscript the entire talk, but then learn it well enough to do it extemporaneously without notes. That’s what I did on Sunday. Here’s a peek at the beginning of my manuscript, for those who are interested, and then a link to the audio on the church’s site if you wanna hear the talk online.

Daddy…Notice Me

It was about 7:25 AM on a Wednesday morning last January, and I said the coldest meanest cruelest thing you could say to a teenage girl. I said…

“Where is your coat?”

Yes. Those were my cruel words. That was my heinous crime. It’s 28 degrees outside, my daughter comes downstairs in jeans and a t-shirt and I ask her, “Where’s your coat.”

There’s Hitler, Osama Bin Laden…  and me!

Ashley responded to my atrocious and brutal demands.

“What coat? I don’t need a coat!”

That’s how the argument started. Sounds innocent enough, right? It’s January. The cars are all covered with frost. The cat is frozen solid on the back lawn! Isn’t it logical for a dad to ask his 14-year-old daughter where her coat is?

That’s what I thought. Fast forward just two minutes and you would have witnessed a full-blown apocalypse—tears, yelling, backpacks getting airborne. Even the dog retreated to the other room.

Where is that sweet little girl that used to look up to me with her big blue eyes and call me Daddy?

Apparently I didn’t get the memo that there was a jacket shortage in the house. Strike that. Thirteen different girls’ jackets habitat our front closet, just no fashionable jackets, worthy of a stylish freshman girl. That’s why my coat mandate was met with such opposition.

I didn’t see it coming. Having no clue that this would forever be remembered in the McKee house as ‘the coat incident of 2012,’ I maintained my ground. “Sorry Ashley, it’s January. You can see your breath. Put on a jacket and let’s go!”

Houston, we have liftoff.

No need to tell you the rest of that story. If you have a teenage daughter you’ve lived that story.

What am I missing here? Am I that clueless? Does raising teenage girls require drama? Is this an MTV reality show or my house?

Being a dad is difficult. This kind of stuff makes us hesitant to intervene.

Sadly, some dads experience moments like this and withdraw. It’s a common male response. We say, “I’m not even going to try to understand.” Sometimes…that’s smart. But some dads take that a little too far, and in attempt to distance themselves from this kind of drama, they distance themselves from their kids totally….

CLICK HERE TO LISTEN/DOWNLOAD THIS TALK
FROM THE CHURCH WEBSITE- JUNE 17, 2012

Posted in Church, Parenting |  | Leave A Comment

Four Numbers That Will Always Matter in Youth Ministry

Posted on: 06/6/12 11:06 AM | by Jonathan McKee

Life is full of over-reactions…but they are abundant in youth ministry circles.

Have you noticed these swings of the proverbial pendulum?

“Outreach is needed!” “Wait, now we’re ignoring our believers!” “Outreach is bad!”

“We could use events and programs to draw kids!” “Wait, now we’re focusing too much on program, and not enough on the individual.” “Programming is bad!

And now I’m hearing it with numbers again.

“Our youth group has grown to 100 kids weekly.” “Yeah, but the statistic I just read says that all of them are going to Hell…on a bicycle!” “Numbers are bad!”

Sigh.

Can we stop over-reacting and throwing out the baby with the bathwater? (Has anyone actually done this? I wonder if a baby has ever been discarded with bathwater. There has to be a better analogy than this!)

Allow me to be the one to be politically incorrect in today’s ministry world and say it: numbers matter! I realize that some of you think the word “numbers” is the “N” word (you really shouldn’t say that in public, by the way), but I assure you, it’s not. Numbers often open our eyes to the reality of weak areas in our ministry.

Before you scroll directly to the bottom of this blog to post a nasty comment, please hear me out. I’ll keep it simple. Numbers should never be the focus of our ministry, but at times, they provide really helpful information…and a much-needed kick in the butt.

Here’s 4 numbers that will ALWAYS matter in youth ministry:

1.    How many people have you and your leaders led to Christ this year?
Again, before overreacting, note that the Bible actually includes these kinds of numbers. Take a peek at that giant conversion in Acts, Chapter 2. Peter preached, the Lord moved, and “about three thousand were added to their number that day.” (vs. 41). (Did I mention that the Bible has a book titled “Numbers?”) What was Luke thinking when he wrote this down! Didn’t he know that it’s bad to keep track of numbers?

Not true. Numbers often tell us that something is happening the way it’s supposed to happen when we allow the Spirit to work.

If we’re doing ministry in our community, inside and outside the church, people should be meeting Jesus. Does this mean that I should be jealous of Greg because he has led 10 people to put their trust in Christ and I have led only 3? No. But let’s be honest…if I’ve led no one to Christ, I might want to ask why. And if Greg seems to be leading about 10 to 20 people to put their trust in Christ each year and I’m only leading three, I might want to sit down with him, talk with him, and see what I can glean from him. (Especially if Greg is Greg Stier!!!!) We have a lot to learn from each other in the body of Christ. (as iron sharpens iron…)

Numbers keep us accountable to what we should be doing. And we should be introducing people to Christ. If we aren’t…ask why.

2.    How many students are you and your leaders currently discipling?
Ministry doesn’t end with people putting their trust in Jesus. Jesus called us to go and make disciples, not decisions. How many young people are you discipling? If your answer is zero, let me be bold enough to say, you really might want to re-evaluate your ministry.

Better yet, compare this number to the number above—the number of people you and your leaders have led to Christ this year. If the first number is greater, ask why people are making decisions, but not wanting to be discipled  (and that’s an entirely different article). These numbers can help hold us accountable to where we are putting our time. Are we spending 4 hours per week on Wednesday night’s funny video while no kids are being discipled?

Whoops!

Maybe this person should look at numbers to remind himself what’s important.

3.    How many students have you equipped to start using their gifts for the Kingdom?
One of the biggest complaints from the church in the last few years is the large number of teenagers who are walking away from their faith after high school. How many students are we really equipping to own their faith to the point where it spills over and becomes contagious?

That’s really the difference between a kid who’s just growing in their faith and one who’s looking for ministry. The “Looking for Ministry” kid isn’t just growing inwardly, they are following the spirit’s promptings to reach out to others.

Maybe we need to remember to not just focus on ministry to teenagers, but introduce a little bit of ministry by teenagers.

How many student leaders are you developing? How many teenagers have you trained in evangelism this year? How many teenagers are you equipping to do ministry?

These numbers, often ignored, can be some of the most productive numbers you ever count.

4.    How many volunteers have you recruited this year?
Yeah, now I’m really starting to meddle! But let’s face it, we’re doing a great disservice in any youth ministry if we aren’t actively recruiting volunteers to connect with teenagers and be a light in their lives.

Sadly, this area is often put onto the back burner. “I’m a youth pastor, not a recruiter.” Actually, that’s not true. Youth pastors need to be recruiters, equippers and trainers. If the church hires a person to just hang out with teenagers, they made a mistake. Why hire one person to hang out with teenagers when instead you can hire one person who will recruit 20 or 30 volunteers who will all hang out with teenagers?

If you’re a youth worker who finds yourself saying, “I hate recruiting” …you’re not alone. You just need to rethink your methodology (here’s some free help).

How many potential volunteers have you asked to come sit in on a junior high Bible study with you sometime? How many potential volunteers have you asked to drive a vanload of teenagers to the music festival? How many potential volunteers did you give just a small taste of your ministry, following up with them a week later, affirming them for their help and letting them know what a difference they made?

These kinds of numbers keep you accountable to recruiting workers for the harvest.

5.    How few Doritos can you eat after tasting one in a bowl in front of you?
This probably isn’t really important, I just think you’re amazing if you can eat less than 5!!!

Please don’t focus on numbers. Please don’t let numbers define your “value.” Please don’t brag about your numbers. Please don’t let numbers boost your personal pride.

But please… let numbers hold you accountable to the work of the Kingdom.

Ponytailed Pastor

Posted on: 05/10/12 2:55 PM | by Jonathan McKee

I’ve never heard of a “ponytail” being used for the kingdom. But in the case of Mick… it’s the truth.

Mick was nothing like I expected when I was introduced to the senior pastor at this small town Nebraskan church. Mick was wearing jeans, Converse and a t-shirt with Einstein’s face when he met me at the church on Saturday night.

It only took listening to a few people in the congregation before I immediately deduced how much Mick meant to this church.

“Mick has helped make this church the ‘go to’ place in this community when someone is hurting,” Stan McNabb shared. Stan is a volunteer youth worker in the church. “If someone is in the hospital fighting for their life, it doesn’t matter if they go to this church. The family wants to talk with Mick.”

When Mick finished his masters degree at Denver Seminary, he was offered a  pastorship at the small EV Free church in the middle of nowhere Nebraska. Mick moved out there with his wife and kids and immediately got a reputation in the community—the new pastor with the ponytail.

If you live in a small town you understand. Word gets around fast. Everybody knows everybody. When Mick walked into the Dollar General and people got a glimpse of the ponytail, he could almost hear the whispers, “That must be him.”

Big city pastors probably don’t know what it’s like to have the word “Hey! It’s me, the new pastor!” tattooed on your forehead. For Mick, he found that it opened up some incredible doors for conversations. But it also created some serious accountability.

Think about this.

How big a tip do you leave Katy, the waitress in the one diner who has probably served the entire town their breakfast at one time or another?

What films are you renting at the video counter at the gas stop? (Yeah, no Blockbuster Video in this town)

Are you patient when Janet, the town gossip, corners you and talks your ear off for half an hour?

A few years ago the community suffered a series of tragedies. Mick immediately made himself available to the families. It wasn’t long before people knew, the guy with the ponytail is a good listener. If you want to go to a church where everyone is accepted, go to the church with the ponytailed pastor.

Mick doesn’t have the ponytail anymore. He was loosing too much hair on top and didn’t want to do the “Phil Collins.” But Mick doesn’t need the ponytail any longer. Everyone knows who he is. He’s the guy that leaves Katy a nice tip every time.

What about you?

What if you had “I’m a follower of Jesus” tattood on your forehead? Would it make a difference how you lived?

What would the people in your town say about you?

Something Unique from Doug and Jim

Posted on: 04/9/12 3:35 PM | by Jonathan McKee

I got a little something for everyone today: free books, free admissions to a brand new conference you’re gonna love, 50% discounts, and… a new workshop I’m launching.

UPDATE: We’ve posted winners of this contest near the bottom of this post!

I’ve been looking for a venue to introduce my new parenting workshop, “Get Your Teenagers Talking,” so when Doug Fields called me a few weeks ago and asked me to teach the parenting track at their FAM Conference, May 10-12 in Southern CA… I knew this would be the place to debut this fun new workshop where I help parents open up the channels of communication in their homes and connect with their teenagers.

I also thought this would be a good opportunity to give away some free stuff to my blog readers, like two free admissions to the FAM Conference! For those who don’t win, Doug has provided me with a code for all of my blog readers that will give you 50% off admission if you sign up in the next two weeks. (More on these prizes and discounts in a minute.)

I really love what Jim Burns and Doug Fields are doing with this fun little conference at Azusa Pacific University. Jim and Doug are hosts, and they’ve brought out some amazing speakers like Jim Daly, George Barna and Dr. John Townsend (to name a few). Then they offer different tracks like my parenting track, a “Sticky Faith” youth ministry track taught by Kara Powell, or the children’s ministry track taught by author/speaker Christine Yount-Jones. There are 8 tracks total (see here).

One element I really like is the fact that, in addition to the tracks you choose, the FAM Conference offers Saturday seminars taught by all the workshop teachers so attendees can get a taste of a different track. So, for example, you could attend Kara’s youth ministry track on Friday, then come to my parenting track Saturday, which is when I’ll be debuting my “Getting Your Teenagers Talking.” (Friday I’m teaching my “Parenting the Texting Generation” workshop.)

But I guess the element that is the biggest plus of this conference is something that Jim and Doug have always brought to their conferences… personal attention. This conference offers very intimate sessions where you’ll have a chance to interact with the speakers. Plus, speakers like Jim, Doug and myself always make ourselves available at these kind of conferences to talk with you over meals and even one-on-one times. Well worth the price… especially the 50% discount price!

This conference is only about 5 weeks away! So let me cut to the chase and give you the DISCOUNT and CONTEST DETAILS:

50% Discount to FAMConference– Just pop on this page to register and enter the word “Doug” (no quotes) in the “special code” box and you’ll receive a 50% discount off all who register! (If you win the contest, your money will be refunded.)

Free Admission to FAMConference(UPDATE: This winner for this has now been chosen- we’ll post it soon!) I’m giving away two free admissions to this conference. The contest is simple. Just submit a comment in this blog and complete this sentence: “I’d definitely attend a parenting workshop if the speaker…” I’ll randomly draw a winner in just a few days and post it on my blog. And just for fun, I’ll go ahead and throw a couple copies of my parenting book in the mix of prizes, Candid Confessions of an Imperfect Parent.

WINNERS: Congratulations to David Shade of Whittier, CA! You are the winner of the two free passes to this FAM Conference! (Make sure we connect there! I’d love to meet you!)

Congratulations to the following people who won copies of my book, Candid Confessions of an Imperfect Parent. Use the CONTACT US button at the top of this blog to email me your address so I can send you a copy!

Sharon Stoltzfus

Brandi Barnette

For more details about the FAMConference, go to FAMConference.com

If you’re interested in bringing me out to your city to teach this new parenting workshop, Getting Your Teenagers Talking, CLICK HERE.

The Gospel Project

Posted on: 03/13/12 2:18 PM | by Jonathan McKee

Maybe you’ve heard, and maybe you haven’t, but LifeWay is rolling out a new curriculum called The Gospel Project. Consequently, my friend and fellow writer David R. Smith and I were invited to join a group of Christian leaders in Nashville (at LifeWay’s headquarters) to participate in a live webcast where the resource was to be introduced to the world.

Then, I got this nasty eye infection, and had to back out. (Dang!)

So that means that today, while I continue to recover from “ol’ zombie eye” as I call it, David is enjoying Tennessee BBQ without me while hanging with Mark Driscoll, Matt Chandler, David Platt, Ed Stetzer and about 75 other movers and shakers in today’s American church.

As you’re reading this, David is meeting the writers and developers of this initiative. It’s basically a “multigeneration, Gospel-centered Bible study” for children, students and adults that “examines the breadth of the Bible and seeks to reveal to participants how every story, every theological concept and missional truth points to Jesus.”

You might want to re-read that last line. They’ve crammed a lot into this!

In a nutshell, LifeWay is rolling out a tool that allows church leaders to teach the entire congregation the exact same truth…all at the same time! So far, it looks pretty strong. There have been other resources like this one that impact all people of the church at once, for instance, The Purpose Driven Life challenges.

Please pray for David’s travel and time spent in Nashville. Also, check back here tomorrow for a sneak peek at what David learned about The Gospel Project. It’s set for pre-order in May, but David will guest blog here tomorrow, offering his two cents on the initiative so you can make an informed decision about this tool. Also, we’ll probably be giving away a few of these kits as the release time draws closer. Don’t miss it!

Teenagers Looking for Ministry?

Posted on: 10/13/11 10:10 AM | by Jonathan McKee

A few weeks ago I was sitting in the front row of a church waiting to speak, and after hearing a few announcements about the numerous ministries the church was actively doing in the community I turned to the pastor sitting next to me and said, “Wow, this church is really making a ‘hands-on’ impact in the community.”

The pastor pointed up on stage and said, “See that bass player? He’s a doctor and has three residents. Every month he takes his residents with him and they go to a homeless area of our city and just start helping people one at a time. No facility, no clinic… he just walks up to a homeless person, introduces himself as a doctor who would like to help and then asks if he can check their ears, their feet, etc. Often he’ll find an infection of some sort and he’ll send one of his residents right then to go fill a prescription and bring it back to the person within the hour.”

The whole church is involved in ministries like this, and the teenagers notice.

What do the teenagers in your community see from the church? Are they learning to serve and love the community like Christ himself demonstrated? Or do they only see that from Lady Gaga?

You see, this young generation is a very “cause” oriented generation. They are looking for ways to make a difference. The question is… who do they see really making an impact? Earlier this year I shared with you how Lady Gaga was named the #1 key influencer to young people, known for compassion, raising millions for Japan and being a spokesperson for numerous causes. Since then, Forbes even named her #1 most powerful celebrity women, beating out Oprah.

Do your teenagers see more compassion and service out of Gaga than the church? Are believer seeking to get their hands dirty and serve like Christ modeled?

Are you creating opportunities for ministry by teenagers?

This Friday my church opens up its gym to anyone needy in the community—something they call “Second Fridays.” It’s this simple. They feed a meal to anyone who is hungry.

Every second Friday hundreds show up for these “Second Friday” meals. Justin, a 17-year-old in my church shows up every week to serve food and just hang out with the needy people there. “I just love hanging out with them.” Justin told me. “They’re real people with real stories. I can talk with them for hours.”

Justin’s first taste of this ministry was years ago, going with his family and serving back in the kitchen. As Justin became a steady and dedicated volunteer, he began to get to know some of the needy people that returned each month. Now Justin’s job is to interact with the people.

Second Fridays opens the doors to tons of other ministry opportunities. They church gives away coats and clothing, they also have people there that provide haircuts and other needs.

Are you developing Justins in your church?

What are some of the ways people in your church serve and love others?

(Jonathan talks more about creating opportunities for teenagers to do ministry in his powerful book, MINISTRY BY TEENAGERS)

Video Interview About Student Leadership

Posted on: 07/18/11 2:01 PM | by Jonathan McKee

A month or so ago I was interviewed by a pretty tech-savy young youth worker named Robbie Mackenzie– a fun conversation. Robbie had read my book, Ministry by Teenagers, and had some questions about developing teenagers who want to grow and serve. He interviewed me via Skype (pretty cool), asking me about teenagers doing ministry, growing in their faith, and what that actually looks like.

Here’s a few of his questions: 

  1. Why do we even need teenage leadership?
  2. What are some snares that Satan throws at student leaders?
  3. Training is so important. How do you do that with teenagers?
  4. What are some other resources that can help youth leaders out when it comes to helping kids grow in their faith and start doing ministry?
  5. Let’s say I’m a newbie at youth ministry and I don’t know what to do at all. What one thing would you tell them?

Here’s the video. (By the end of the video, are you as intrigued as I am watching my hyperactive foot? Wow!!!)