Sex… MTV Style

Posted on: 09/29/08 4:20 PM | by Jonathan McKee

Tonight MTV launches their brand new show Sex… With Mom and Dad.

What a title.

I’ve got two words about this show: Dr. Drew.

Dr. Drew is the doctor giving advice on the popular radio show Loveline. If you’ve worked with kids for a while, then you’ve probably heard a mention of this racy show. In my city, it aires at 10:00 p.m. on one of the most popular radio channels. It’s truly X-rated. Kids and young adults call up for sexual advice. It’s hard to listen to. If you are a parent or youth worker, I encourage you to listen to it once. You won’t believe your ears.

This is the kind of advice kids are getting when it comes to their sexual decision making.

Now, we can probably expect the same kind of discretion with the new MTV show. This week David’s Youth Culture Window article tells you all you need to know about it. Take a look at that if you haven’t already.

“We” and “Them” at “See You at the Pole”

Posted on: 09/25/08 2:33 PM | by Jonathan McKee

Yesterday morning was an event called “See You at the Pole” (SYATP). Thousands of Christian kids around the country gathered around the flagpoles at their schools to pray… or… to take a stand… it really depends on the group.

Sorry, I just can’t get behind it.

I didn’t even mention the event in our EZINE or in my blogging the past few weeks. I’ve received emails asking me about the event and asking me to publicize it. I haven’t.

Why? Am I a SYATP hater?

I’ve never really verbalized my feelings about the event. My mom taught me… if you don’t have something nice to say, don’t say it at all. So for the last couple years I just kept silent. But people are beginning to ask questions. I even was forwarded this blog –SYATP is Stupid! – written from a guy who really doesn’t like the event.

Is this guy a hater?

I hate to admit it… (and I wouldn’t probably title my article like this guy’s), but I can’t disagree with this guy.

Here’s what I have noticed year after year at SYATP. Adults tell Christian kids to go stand at the flagpole and pray for their school. “It’s their right!” The event is “adult driven.”

Now fast forward to the actual Wednesday morning where a kid is standing next to the pole… struggling with one overwhelming thought. “What is everyone thinking of me right now?” Is that what we’re trying to accomplish?

A practice that is supposed to be our communication with God has just turned into a giant struggle with pride. Temptation while standing at the pole is, “Look at me!” not, “Look at God!”

The question I have is simple. Where is the Biblical basis for this event? Because if we look at what the Bible says about prayer, I only find passages talking about how we should NOT pray to be seen by others. Jesus himself said that we should go and close the door to pray.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying that anyone who has done SYATP has bad motives. A ton of us have tried SYATP with good motives. I’ve tried it for years. I’ve made videos, spoken at rallies, and encouraged my kids to attend. I think my motives were good. I think many of my kids motives were good. But after observing it for years, I’ve taken a step back and tried to take an honest look at the results. I encourage you to do the same. What did this event accomplish? Did it help my kids learn to pray? Was it helping them be an effective witness for Him? More importantly… ask yourself a bigger question. Why are we encouraging our kids to go do this public display of prayer when the Bible not only doesn’t support it, it seems to speak against it?

What the heck is SYATP? It’s more like SOKUF. Set Our Kids Up for Failure.

A couple years ago my friend KJ went to a local campus to watch it all go down. A handful of Christian students gathered around the flagpole staring at the ground. One of the kid’s friends came up and looked at the ground to see what his friend was staring at. Finally, confused he spoke up. “What are you doing man?”

The Christian kid looked up and said, “Are you a Christian?”

The friend said, “I don’t know. I don’t think so.”

The Christian said, “Then get out of here!”

I’ve written articles about SYATP before, trying to not stop the moving train, but maybe guide it to safer tracks. But I’m tired of trying to put icing on the turd. I’m just not pumping it anymore. SYATP breeds a mentality of “us” vs. “them.” It’s not in the literature, but it reeks of, We Christians need to stand up for what we believe… amongst these dirty pagans! Nice. That attitude will bring a ton of people to Christ! (sarcasm intended).

Sorry guys, but I just don’t think Jesus was in the Bible Club at his high school. I think he was in metal shop.

Jesus went away to pray a ton… I just don’t remember it being in front of everyone.

Am I wrong?

If parents said, “you can’t watch this…”

Posted on: 09/15/08 5:29 PM | by Jonathan McKee

Time Magazine just came out with an amazing article called “The Truth About Teen Girls.” My favorite part of the article- a quote from an MTV producer who tells it like it is. Wow!

I’ll give you the whole paragraph, emphasis mine:

Middle school counselor Julia Taylor of North Carolina had a conversation with her sixth-graders last year that worried her. “A lot of them were watching The O.C.,” she says. “I just remember the show’s multiple sexual partners, the cocaine use, and then at the end, they drink, they drive, they set fires, but all is well! There are never any consequences.” Taylor understands the media better than many. Her sister Mary is a producer who has worked on MTV shows including My Super Sweet 16 and Spring Break. “I’m messing them up, and she’s fixing them,” says Mary jokingly. But Mary also suggests that if nobody were watching the shows or buying the products that are advertised on them, they wouldn’t succeed. “We’re not Little House on the Prairie anymore,” she says. “The world is different. If parents said, ‘You can’t watch this,’ and the ratings dropped, maybe we would change things.”

The entire article is good. Here’s another snippet:

…teenage sexuality is growing only more heated. Girlhood sexiness seems to be everywhere: on TV shows and in movies, in advertising, in teen magazines and all over the Internet. Most disturbingly, it seems to be coming from the girls themselves: the way they dress, the way they text, the way they present themselves on Facebook and, oh, mercy, what they get up to at parties. There are whispers, stories for which the anecdotal evidence–from school counselors and child psychologists and mothers–keeps accumulating like a national pile of unwashed laundry. These suggest teen girls are getting very liberal with sexual favors, especially of the type detailed in the Starr report. In one generation, girls seem to have moved from Easy-Bake to easy virtue.

Click here for the whole article. (thanks to David and Ypulse for bringing the article to my attention)

 

Girl Auctions Off Her Virginity

Posted on: 09/12/08 5:58 AM | by Jonathan McKee

Wow… this is sad on so many different levels. This is from my local news here in Sacramento, our CBS Channel 13:

A Sacramento State grad is trying to make money the old fashioned way, by auctioning off her virginity to help pay for her graduate studies.   And so far, bidding is up to $250,000.

The 22-year-old who is using the pseudonym Natalie Dylan for safety reasons is going through a legal brothel in Nevada to sell her virginity. “The main purpose of this is to finance a couple things in my life,” Dylan told CBS13.  “I think empowerment of women is picking yourself up and doing something on your own to better yourself.”

Better yourself? I guess she missed the point of the 1993 Robert Redford, Demi Moore film, Indecent Proposal.

Dylan says she’s already taken a polygraph test to prove her virginal status, and is also willing to undergo a medical exam.

The auction will take place at the Bunny Ranch in Carson City, Nevada with bids coming in through their website.  Owner Dennis Hof tells CBS13 that eBay rejected the auction, so he’ll handle the entire process.

Here’s the kicker.

Hof says Dylan is a bright, beautiful young woman who’s going to consider a number of factors in her decision because she wants her first time to be a positive experience. “Natalie is a very smart girl. All she wants to do is get her master’s degree in family and marriage counseling and be a psychologist.  She’s selling her virginity to accomplish that,” Hof told CBS13. “She’s smart enough to sell it.  This is empowering her.”

Hmmmmmm.   (click here for the entire article and the news video- the opinions people share in the video are intriguing!)

(thanks to Brandon for forwarding this)

Reality Television at Blame

Posted on: 08/22/08 9:14 AM | by Jonathan McKee

There really isn’t all that much I can add to this Media Life Research article:

Reality television has already been blamed for many societal ills, from the dumbing-down of television to the rise of the faux celebrity culture (think “Surreal World” contestants). Is it also responsible for promoting promiscuity?

Yes, says a new study from the State University of New York at Buffalo, at least when it comes to online social networks. The study blames heavy reality TV consumption for the proliferation of “promiscuous friending,” or being more likely to engage in friendships with people with whom you have no off-line relationship. Heavy reality TV viewers have larger social networks than average and share more photos online. What’s more, heavy reality TV viewers may adapt personality traits associated with celebrities, such as sharing personal information with all those online friends. The researchers say reality TV even may be to blame for the erosion of the distinction between the everyday world and the celebrity world.  (click here for the entire article)

It’s always fun when I see research confirm my own observations.

(shout out to Anastasia at YPulse for the link)

Disney Panties Pulled From Shelves

Posted on: 08/18/08 9:45 AM | by Jonathan McKee

And to think, I was surprised when I saw junior high girls walking around the mall with the word “juicy” imprinted across their butt.

Disney just came out with a new line of High School Musical panties for kids (as in, 7-years-old)… with the words “Dive In” on the front of them. The funny thing is, apparently, (according to this NYMag Fashion article) the way it was packaged, you don’t see the words until you open up the package… or until your 8 year old walks into the room wearing a Winnie the Pooh t-shirt and her new undies bearing the message “Dive In.”

Anyway… Disney issued a statement:

“Unfortunately, an oversight was made and the text on the underwear was used out context.”  (Reuters, 8/16/08)

Yeah… right! Maybe they need to have my high school son and his friends on their committee. I can’t even say the word “balls” at soccer practice without getting a chuckle. Who the heck is missing the connotations of the words “dive in” on the front of a pair of panties? Perhaps they need to hire the 5th grade boy wearing the South Park shirt that lives down the street from me to start screening this stuff.

Ironic: Disney is apologizing for these suggestive panties… but aren’t they just following suit from other designers out there (like Beyonce’- I blogged about that before)? I seem to not be alone in that opinion.

Hmmmmmmm.

Rihanna Knocks Katy Perry Outta #1

Posted on: 08/14/08 10:54 AM | by Jonathan McKee

Katy Perry (I Kissed a Girl) has been riding the #1 spot on the Billboard charts for 7 weeks now, but this week Rihanna’s Disturbia bumped her down.

Months ago I blogged about Perry’s song, I Kissed a Girl and I Liked It, a blog that has attracted over 10,000 web views and hundreds of heated comments (some of which I didn’t even bother posting). I have been frustrated with the song because of its “do what feels right at the moment” message that kids love hearing.

Unfortunately, I can’t say that its replacement is anything of redeeming value.

Rihanna is definitely one to watch (I often recommend that parents and youth workers keep their eyes on certain artists, because their kids are), with two hits in Billboards top 10 right now, and rapidly becoming one of the most popular female artists:

Rihanna’s “Disturbia” puts an end to the seven-week run at No. 1 by Katy Perry’s “I Kissed a Girl” on the Billboard Hot 100, rising 3-1 after selling 148,000 downloads, according to Nielsen SoundScan. It’s Rihanna’s fourth chart-topper here, tying her with Beyonce and Mariah Carey for the most by a female artist this decade. (Billboard)

Most of us know Rihanna from her song Umbrella… eh, eh, eh… but she is proving to be far more than a one hit wonder.

Her song Disturbia is interesting. The lyrics are very vague. The video is typical of Rihanna’s videos– highly sexualized. But this one has a dark edge.

It’s no surprise that Rihanna is popular. She’s pretty, she’s got talent, she’s partnered with some of the best (Jay Z, Chris Brown) and she’s usually provocative. It sells!

Hmmmmmmm.

Good for Miley

Posted on: 08/5/08 9:15 AM | by Jonathan McKee

When Miley’s in the headlines… I’m always a little worried. Miley is a good clean girl, but she’s a teenager who’s grown up in the spotlight. That’s a tough gig. And she’s made her fair share of mistakes. Haven’t we all?

I’ve blogged about Miley’s ups and downs before, but today I’m compelled to share, Miley made me proud twice yesterday.

1. Miley didn’t fall into the trap of controversy by kissing the girl…

Miley might have had the opportunity to join the legacy of Madonna and Brittany on stage last night with Katy Perry. Media Life Magazine provides the details in their article about all the buzz:

Between that infamous Vanity Fair photo shoot and the suggestive pictures that have been floating around the internet, Miley Cyrus apparently feels she’s done enough to sex up her image this year.

The 15-year-old pop star, who hosts Fox’s “Teen Choice Awards” tonight at 8 p.m., turned down an offer from “I Kissed a Girl” singer Katy Perry to recreate the infamous Britney Spears-Madonna liplock from the “MTV Video Awards” a few years back.

Whew! We’ve had enough of Katy’s influence this year.

2. Miley brought good clean fun to last night’s Teen Choice Awards.

The Teen Choice Awards is not always an easy pill for parents to swallow ( a show that twice over the years has topped the Parents Television Council’s “Worst Family TV Show of the Week”). Last night, Miley was a breath of fresh air on the show.

Today I’ll provide all the details in my annual review of last night’s show in our Youth Culture Window article (posted tonight). But it was nice to have a host that not only avoided risque humor (like past hosts), but when winning her own award, gave a huge thanks to “the most important man in my life, who I love so so much, and thats Big Jesus Christ up there (pointing up).”

“Gossip Girl” Pushing the Limits

Posted on: 07/31/08 2:25 PM | by Jonathan McKee

If you’ve seen even a few minutes of the TV show Gossip Girl, you probably wouldn’t let your teenagers watch it. (Heck, if you knew what the “textspeak” slang in the ad to the right meant… you wouldn’t let your kids watch it.)

Today’s Reuters article,about the hit teenage show (“Sex and the City” for teens? Critics slam “Gossip Girl”) summarizes it well.

“Their wardrobes are full of designer clothes, they drink cocktails at New York City’s coolest bars, dabble in drugs, have sex in places like the back of a limousine — all while still in high school.”

Now even some of the actors are verbalizing their surprise about the racy content.

Blake Lively, 20, who plays character Serena van der Woodsen, says even she is surprised by plot lines of the show. “Everybody is dating everyone and sleeping with everyone and there’s lots of scandalous stuff happening in the Upper East Side,” she told a news conference. “Even I am shocked; I’m expecting my sister, that I don’t have, to be my father.”

And where are the parents of the literally millions of kids that watch this show?

How Skinny Do They Have to Be?

Posted on: 07/28/08 7:53 AM | by Jonathan McKee

Have you ever wonder how men have pulled it off? How is it that we have created a fashion style where guys can wear big, loose, baggy clothes, but girls need to wear tight, or revealing clothes?

Our young girls are buying into the unrealistic expectations of what they are “supposed” to look like.”

I was shopping in a store for my wife the other day (her birthday coming up), and asked what size shirt was up on display on the mannequin (it was the last one left). The sales clerk told me X-small (the size I was looking for). She told me she couuld get it for me, but she needed to take out all the pins holding the “excess” shirt back. She commented, “You should see how skinny these mannequins are that corporate sends us. All the X-small clothes fall right off them. We need to pin everything back to make it look how it would actually look on an X-small girl.”

I came home and saw this add from another company.

Super Skinny? Maybe we should just call it “Bulimic Jeans.”

How skinny are we trying to make our kids?

I remember last December reading an article about the pressure to look perfect driving girls to destructive behavior. Here’s a glimpse:

The Dove Campaign for Real Beauty is partnering with the entertainment industry to address this issue by giving girls a reality check educating them about what images are real versus Hollywood magic. This global program is especially relevant as girls today are measuring themselves against impossible beauty ideals… The new campaign was developed to help girls realize what they see in movies and magazines represents an unrealistic standard of beauty, not an everyday achievable look.

Hmmmmmmm.