TV Still Rules

Posted on: 03/24/11 4:06 PM | by Jonathan McKee

I’m preparing to teach two training workshops this weekend, a “Discipleship” workshop to the teachers/faculty at a Christian school tomorrow, and then my parenting workshop in Eastern PA on Sunday. Doing a little research, I thought I’d check in on the ongoing battle between internet and TV, both media channels vying for our kids’ attention.

This is always an interesting study. Common perception is that kids spend much more time on the internet each day. But time and time again, to most people’s surprise, TV proves to be the primary media “time sponge” for young people.

In Kaiser’s huge media consumption report last year, kids averaged about 90 minutes per day on the internet, where they soaked up a good 4.5 hours on the TV immersed in American Idol, Jersey Shore, Family Guy, etc. (MTV is often the most watched network by young people)

Nielson’s brand new State of the Media report (free registration required to view whole report) reveals just how much TV kids were absorbing each day in quarter four. Check out this chart– the monthly hours of each age group in the last quarter of 2010:   (notice that my age group watches waaaaaaay more TV than our kids)

If you combine the top two rows, 12-17 year-olds are averaging almost 3 hours and 44 minutes per day of TV. About 6 months ago Nielson was reporting 12-17 year olds average about of 3 hours 46 minutes per day. Not much of a shift.

Wondering what people are watching? This past week American Idol still ruled broadcast TV, and Jersey Shore still reigned supreme on Cable.

Sigh.

Candid Confessions is in…

Posted on: 03/22/11 5:29 PM | by Jonathan McKee

Wow… cool surprise today. A huge shipment of my brand new parenting books (due on the shelves April 1) just arrived here today. I tore open a few of the boxes like a kid on Christmas… of course… I knew what was in this present.

I’m staring at a copy right now in my hand. Standard Publishing did a great job putting it together. The cover surprised me– it looks waaaaaay better on the book itself than on the computer screen. My compliments to the printers. The layout is really nice too. They added the “toast smoke” throughout by the end of each of the chapters next to the “Reflection Questions”. The back cover turned out really well too. They chose two good endorsements for the back (Jim Burns and Kevin Leman).

Anyway… they’re here! That means, for those who pre-ordered, AND who order the books from our web site now, I’m mailing out those signed books immediately! (I know, I know… I offered a special deal signing all pre-ordered books. I’ll go ahead and continue signing all copies that people order during this first month). So if you missed the pre-order, no worries. Just order HERE.

Here’s a peek at the back cover.

Standard was also really good about plugging TheSource4Parents.com, including the web address on the back cover. Hopefully that will drive a lot more people to the free resources on our parents’ page.

For those that are coming out to my workshop in PA this weekend… I’ll have my books there too.

A huge shout out to all my blog subscribers who helped us choose this cover and get this thing out quickly! Thanks everyone!

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Monogamy a Good Thing?

Posted on: 03/21/11 3:48 PM | by Jonathan McKee

A lot of news about abstinence, sex and monogamy lately, mostly due to a Center for Disease Control report that came out earlier this month reporting that abstinence is actually up.

Yep… you read that right. Today, more kids are waiting to engage in sexual activity.

You can read more about this interesting changing trend- I wrote an entire Youth Culture Window article on the subject, summarizing and linking the report (and others). If you haven’t seen that you’ll wanna be sure and take a peek: Abstinence is Up– But Consequences Not Down.

Pay careful attention to the end of the article, because I implore parents once again, “Have ongoing talks with our kids about sex.” Ongoing conversations is a principle I talk about frequently in my book coming out at the end of this week, Candid Confessions of an Imperfect Parent (Pre-order a signed copy of this book from Jonathan now).

I’ve been seeing some other people chiming in on the subject as well. I found this particular New York Times Opinion page article interesting, Why Monogamy Matters. Here, the author mentions the same report, but also talks about some interesting findings– such as those noted by Mark Regnerus and Jeremy Uecker, in their recent book, “Premarital Sex in America.” According to their research, the more monogamous the woman is, the “happier” she is.

I quote:

Among the young people Regnerus and Uecker studied, the happiest women were those with a current sexual partner and only one or two partners in their lifetime. Virgins were almost as happy, though not quite, and then a young woman’s likelihood of depression rose steadily as her number of partners climbed and the present stability of her sex life diminished.

You don’t see that on an episode of Two and a Half Men.

Senior Citizen Texting Dictionary

Posted on: 03/17/11 4:25 PM | by Jonathan McKee

I’m turning 41 this Friday… but I’m not feeling that old. (That’s a good thing, right?)

Sure, I’ve got three teenagers of my own, and that’s probably why I discover new grey hairs daily… but hey! I feel good! Heck, I’ve got almost 30 years left before I can even claim social security!  (Although, I imagine that, even then, I’ll be trying to keep up with the youngins!)

So I found this little piece from my friend Mike over at Mikey’s Funnies pretty amusing:

STC (Senior Texting Codes)

Since more and more seniors citizens are texting and tweeting, there appears to be a need for a STC (Senior Texting Code). If you qualify for senior discounts, these are the codes for you:

ATD: At The Doctor’s
BFF: Best Friend Farted
BTW: Bring The Wheelchair
BYOT: Bring Your Own Teeth
CBM: Covered By Medicare
CUATSC: See You At The Senior Center
DWI: Driving While Incontinent
FWB: Friend With Beta Blockers
FWIW: Forgot Where I Was
FYI: Found Your Insulin
GGPBL: Gotta Go, Pacemaker Battery Low!
GHA: Got Heartburn Again
IMHO: Is My Hearing-Aid On?
LMDO: Laughing My Dentures Out
LOL: Living On Lipitor
LWO: Lawrence Welk’s On
OMMR: On My Massage Recliner
OMSG: Oh My! Sorry, Gas.
ROFL… CGU: Rolling On The Floor Laughing…Can’t Get Up
TTYL: Talk To You Louder
WAITT: Who Am I Talking To?
WTP: Where’s The Prunes?
WWNO: Walker Wheels Need Oil

Posted in Humor, Personal |  | Leave A Comment

Parenting Book and Training Workshop

Posted on: 03/16/11 10:52 AM | by Jonathan McKee

You’ve been seeing a lot of great resources for parents coming from us lately… and here’s a couple more you will definitely want to know about.

1. My new book, Candid Confessions of an Imperfect Parent:

I’m getting a shipment of these in just a couple weeks– before they hit the shelves everywhere else. So we just put them up for pre-order on our site- I’m signing every book that’s pre-ordered! (Sorry for some of you who tried to order these earlier this week- we had a glitch on our website book page- it’s ALL FIXED now!)

So pre-order that now and I’ll personally ship you a signed copy as soon as I get the shipment at the end of this month!

2. My Parenting Workshop:

I’ve already got six of these workshops booked across the country for 2011. Check my speaking calendar (about halfway down this pageand see if I’ll be near you. If not, contact me and see about bringing me out to your city.

A week from Sunday I’ll be near Harrisburg, PA doing a parenting workshop. If you’re within driving distance from there, come out to see me at that workshop. I’ll have copies of my new book with me. Here’s more info on that workshop.

Get a Signed Copy of My Parent Book

Posted on: 03/13/11 3:44 PM | by Jonathan McKee

Okay everyone, I just heard that I’m going to receive my shipment of my new parenting book, Candid Confessions of an Imperfect Parent, in just a couple weeks- the last week of March, a little earlier than everyone else. So I wanted to offer you a little something:

Anyone who jumps on my parenting page and pre-orders the book in the next two weeks, I’m going to personally sign a copy and ship it to ya.

You can read more about the book and check out what others are saying about it HERE.

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But Mom, It’s Only 9PM…

Posted on: 03/9/11 2:14 PM | by Jonathan McKee

This morning I was talking with my 15-year-old daughter Alyssa on the way to school about a friend of hers who she’s been praying for. “She’s always in a bad mood,” Alyssa ranted. “She’s got stressful stuff going on at home and she never gets enough sleep.”

Even though I had a good guess as to why, I asked Alyssa, “Why isn’t she getting enough sleep?”

“Because she stays up late texting a guy every night. He’ll text her in the middle of the night. She doesn’t ever turn off her cell phone.”

Alyssa’s friend isn’t alone. As a matter of fact, her friend is in the majority. According to a brand new study by the National Sleep Foundation:

  • The average hours of sleep per night for 13-18-year-olds is 7 hours and 26 minutes, well short of the 9 hours and 15 minutes recommended by experts.
  • 72% of this age group text the hour before bedtime (which the report related to not getting good or enough sleep)
  • 28% of this age group leave their phone ringers on all night in their bedroom (that doesn’t include vibrate)(this group reports getting much less sleep)
  • Average bedtime for this age group is 11:02 p.m.
  • 13-18-year-olds drink, on average, 3.1 caffeinated beverages a day to try to cope with their lack of sleep.

I’ll be honest. Helping our kids get good sleep isn’t easy. I’m not talking about enforcing a “cell phone is off at night” policy -that’s simple. Parent need to just lay down the law (and frankly, if parents find it difficult to enforce, then they might need to just collect cell phones before bedtime).

The difficulty I’m talking about is dealing with how busy our kids are today and the high expectations from school, sports and every facet of their lives. I know Alyssa really struggles to get it all done and still get to bed at a good time: sports/exercise, piano, homework, family dinners, church, reading her Bible… it’s a lot to cram in. Alyssa and I actually sat down this past weekend and tried to schedule some of this stuff and we came up with the tough conclusion that she might have to quit piano for a while.

These are tough choices to make. Alyssa (15), is getting old enough to start making some of these choices on her own. Lori and I are trying to help “think with her” (those who’ve attended my parenting seminars recognize that little catch phrase) through this process.

As my daughter finished telling me about her friend and got out of the car this morning, I asked her. “So does that mean you’re glad that Mom and I make you guys turn off your cell phones before you go to bed?”

She gave me an evil stare (like, “Shut up, I know you’re right. Don’t gloat in it!”)   🙂

AN ASIDE: My parenting book, Candid Confessions of an Imperfect Parent (released at the end of this month) is probably going to be available for pre-sale next week on TheSource4Parents.com

Not Soft on Hell… Nor Excited about It

Posted on: 03/8/11 12:25 PM | by Jonathan McKee

Why is it that when it comes to the subject of Hell, some people seem to either bring it up too much, while others want to suppress the truth of the matter?

A lotta hype about Hell in Christian circles lately, much of it is because speaker/author/pastor Rob Bell seems to be coming out with some pretty radical conclusions about Hell. This New York Times article  provides just a glimpse at the controversy.

My response?

I’ve been watching some people throw some pretty big rocks at each other over this one. So I’m going to try to speak candidly, but without criticism. Seriously… I’m going to try!

And rather than just sharing my take on this, I emailed a couple friends and asked for their two cents because I really respect their opinions. So I’m going to chime in with my two cents, but I’m also going to share what Dan Kimball and David R. Smith shared with me. Then I’m going link some resources for your reference.

My two cents: We need more compassion, and a theology that is unchanged by emotions.

MORE COMPASSION:
Rob has always had a heart for the lost– a very admirable and Christ-like quality. If you’ve ever met someone with a heart for the lost, you might also notice, they grow very frustrated with people who are abrasive to the lost. It comes with the package. Rob reveals this frustration (not a bad thing at all, in my opinion) in his new video about his upcoming book Love Wins, telling the story of an incident at an art show at his church. One of the pieces at this show had a Gandhi quote and someone felt the need to post a note to that quote, writing, “Reality check. He’s in Hell.”

It’s really sad when God’s people forget about love.

Yesterday I was interacting with a few people on our Facebook page about this whole controversy. I commented to someone. People with good theology need to remember that even “good theology” is still just a clanging cymbal without love (I Corinthians 13).

So I praise Bell’s compassion for sinners. That being said, I hope that Rob also doesn’t put on emotionally-distorted reading glasses when reading the truth of God’s Word. As believers, we need to cling to the truth. We need…

A THEOLOGY UNCHANGED BY EMOTIONS
Let me start by going on the record. I wish I could go soft on Hell. The concept of eternal separation from God is an uncomfortable reality. I wish I could believe it wasn’t true. I really do.

But truth wins.

In Rob’s video he says the following:

“Will only a few select people make it to heaven? And will billions and billions of people burn forever in Hell?”

He goes on to say,

“Millions and millions of people were taught that the primary message, the center of the Gospel of Jesus is that God is going to send you to Hell unless you believe in Jesus. And so what gets subtly sort of caught and taught is that Jesus rescues you from God. But what kind of God is that that we would need to be rescued from this God. How could that God be good. How can that God be trusted. And how can that ever be good news. This is why lots of people want nothing to do with the Christian faith. They see it as a endless list of absurdities and inconsistencies.”

He concludes his thoughts with a nice pitch for his new book.

“The good news is actually better than that, better than we could ever imagine. The good news is that love wins.”

We don’t know exactly how this is going to play out in his book, Love Wins, because it isn’t released yet. (Mental Note: This is a pretty dang good way to sell books. Raise a controversy that requires even your critics to have to buy your book just to try to prove you wrong.) That’s why I’m not going to go on the record and criticize his theology, because I haven’t read his book yet. But in his sermons and videos, I have to say, Rob is definitely treading on some dangerous ground here. His video alone seems to convey that mere “belief in Jesus” isn’t good news. After all, this is an uncomfortable fact to unbelievers.

Hmmmm.  It seems to me that after Jesus laid out the “uncomfortable” truth to the crowds in John 6, a bunch of people didn’t want anything to do with him then either.

I’m not going to say anymore yet… because who knows where his book is going.

My friend, author/speaker, Dan Kimball, can’t comment on the book either, because he hasn’t read it. But Dan has wrestled with the topic of hell and other difficult subjects and says this:  (giving me permission to share with you all)

I would love to be a Jesus-died-for-all-universalist. I would love to be an annihilist. I would love to be pro-gay theologically. But from the immense amount of reading, studying the Scriptures, praying, and reading different viewpoints. From looking at church history from the beginning and various beliefs and the culture they developed in…..and looking at contemporary doctrinal beliefs and their history…and personally having talked to scholars over the years that I respect about these very issues like NT Wright, Scot McKnight, Roger Olson, John Walton and the late Stan Grenz……  I find I personally cannot believe those things, although my emotions surely would like to. And it fits so well in culture today. It would be easier being in ministry in our culture today, holding those views for sure. But I cannot compromise what I am convicted that the Scriptures do teach about these things. But how we then teach about them, speak about them etc. is of great, great importance. I think many (especially younger people who don’t have a breadth of knowing church history and patterns of the past) are turned away from these doctrines often not even by the doctrine itself as much as how Christian leaders have taught about them and their attitudes towards others who believe differently.

David R. Smith chimed in as well.

It’s hard to know where Rob Bell will go with this. The videos certainly hint toward a universalist belief, and if they don’t go there, then the publicity certainly was misleading, which says something in itself.

If Rob Bell’s “new treatise” on hell claims a universalist mindset, then it is not new at all. In fact, it’s an issue that thousands of biblical scholars have wrestled with over hundreds of years. Universalists aim to make Christianity more appealing and/or convenient (whether they admit that or not). But if one were to strip the Bible of hell, he actually makes the Christian message far less appealing. That might sound strange, but consider these ramifications if there is no hell.

God is a liar. Jesus talked about hell far too often for it to not exist. It was in His warnings, amongst His parables, and even a part of His Revelation. There was no doubt in His mind that hell existed; He created it! So to concede hell is to concede a truth-telling God. Thus, I won’t concede either one.  

God is a sissy. Everyone who’s ever experienced life on Earth has seen injustice, oppression, evil, sin, and wickedness. In many places around the globe, these dark forces run rampant and unchecked. But God, the ultimate Judge, has decided there will be justice and recompense for those who have suffered at the hands of unrepentant sinners. If God will not judge nations and individuals (as the Bible says He will), He’s nothing more than a cosmic wimp who needs to apologize to 6 million Jews murdered in the Holocaust, and millions more killed in tyrannies around the world. Again, this is a concession that is too expensive to make.    

Ultimately, the reality of hell ties into God’s nature. Rob Bells sees this truth, too, and if his book goes soft on hell (we’ll see soon), then he just misinterprets its impact on God’s character. Regardless of what Bell says, I will continue to believe in a God who tells the truth and will one day judge perfectly and righteously.

I promised you some resources about Hell. Here’re two:

1. Dan Kimball, not only a friend, but a man who’s faith and knowledge of scripture I really respect, wrote an amazing article in Outreach Magazine last year, Teaching the Truth About Hell. This is a great resource to refer to.

2. You can listen to Dan and I talk about hell in our podcast last year, The Podcast from Hell.

Your thoughts?

Parents Getting Their Kids Talking

Posted on: 03/7/11 1:35 PM | by Jonathan McKee

It seems that I hear it again and again as I’m dialoguing with parents after one of my parenting workshops. “I can’t get my kid to open up and just talk with me.”

It’s a common dilemma. Sometimes it maybe be because our conversations with our kids tend to be like this: me lecture, you listen! But often, it’s more than that. It often can be pretty difficult to get kids to open up.

That’s one reason why we created two new pages on our www.TheSource4Parents.com page:

1. MUSIC DISCUSSIONS:
The average 8-18-year-old listens to 2 hours and 19 minutes of music per day. Parents can use current music to springboard conversations with their kids about what they heard. That’s why we’ve created this brand new MUSIC DISCUSSIONS page just for parents (much like our MUSIC DISCUSSIONS page on our youth ministry website, but quicker, simpler, and designed specifically for parents). Be sure to check out this page, because we just added brand new music discussions for parents to talk about hit songs such as Gaga’s Born This Way, Bruno Mars’ Grenade, and more.

2. MOVIE REVIEWS & QUICK Q’s:
Ever walk out of a movie with your kid and wish you had some resources to talk with them about what you just saw? That’s why we decided to add “Quick Q’s” to our movie reviews when we launched our new parents website just a couple months ago. Our MOVIE REVIEWS & QUICK Q’s page, not only provides the reviews, it also provides questions that you can ask kids about what they just saw. Each one of these resources includes a relevant scripture to help you bring truth to the discussion. Check out this page this week– we just added reviews for The Adjustment Bureau in our theatrical release section, and 127 Hours in our rental release section.

Enjoy these resources.

The Adjustment Bureau

Posted on: 03/3/11 2:01 PM | by Jonathan McKee

Do we really have free will… or is God a colossal puppeteer manipulating the strings of all of mankind.

Look out John Calvin, here comes The Adjustment Bureau… and they’re making you submit to “the chairman’s” plan.

Last week my 13-year-old and I were out on a delightful daddy-daughter date (pardon my alliteration) and we saw a screening of this new film, starring Matt Damon and Emily Blunt. Maybe you’ve seen the previews. Damon’s character falls in love with her, but the “bureau” tries to step in and “adjust” his will. But Jason Boerne uses his martial arts skills… wait… wrong film…

Ashley and I really enjoyed the film. It wasn’t the greatest thing we’ve seen this year, but it was entertaining and had good character development (although it did throw in the typical PG-13 “non-nudity” sex scene, as is so abundant today).

I am not only providing a full review of the film on our MOVIE REVIEWS & QUICK Q’s page this weekend (posting it Friday), but I am also providing a discussion adults can use to talk with their kids about free will, the conscious choice to let the Holy Spirit take over our lives, and what that kind of submission looks like day to day. (I’ve loving this new “Quick Q’s” section of our MOVIE REVIEWS & QUICK Q’S page. Each one of our reviews now includes these questions that adults can use to dialogue with young people about what they just saw.)

(SIDE NOTE: If you like those “Quick Q’s, I encourage you to check out a few others I wrote recently on the same page— check out my review of Adam Sandler’s “Just Go With It,” and the Vincint Vaughn and Kevin James flick, “The Dilemma.” I think you’ll find that I provided deep discussions for both of these films)