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The song debuted in the top 10 on Billboard’s Hot 100. The music video is full of celebrity cameos and has already garnered over 100 million views. When I mentioned that particular song speaking at a church last Sunday morning, teens in the audience literally shouted, “Yeah!” in acclamation (and I mentioned about a dozen songs).
I’m talking about the brand new racy music video from Lil Dicky, Freaky Friday, where Lil Dicky wakes up as Chris Brown and Chris Brown as Lil Dicky. The music video is creative, kids think it’s hilarious, and it’s full of sexual references and imagery.
Young people love funny, and music videos that offer creativity and humor often do well (remember Katy Perry’s Last Friday Night?).
But there’s another element that also seems to be doing well right now…
Sexually charged & raunchy (again, remember Katy Perry’s Last Friday Night?). With “artists” like Cardi B all over the top of the charts, we’ve been seeing plenty of this recently. So Lil Dicky’s new video falls in suit.
When kids come across the thumbnail/cover image for the YouTube video, they see this:
How many 13-year-old boys scrolling through their phone in their bedroom at night aren’t gonna click on that?
What kids will see
The video features Lil Dicky waking up in bed with two women in Chris Brown’s body. He then explores Chris Brown’s life, enamored with all the fame, fortune and bling Brown enjoys (also noting, “Holy sh*t, I’ve got a kid!”). Meanwhile, Chris Brown wakes up in Lil Dicky’s body and immediately peeks into his underwear and exclaims:
Ugh, what the f**k
This sh*t is real weak
How his d*ck staying perched up on his balls like that?
Later in the song/video, Lil Dicky in Chris Brown’s body snaps a pic of his junk, and then the real Chris Brown stuck in Lil Dicky’s body says:
My dick is trending on Twitter, f**k
At the end of the song Lil Dicky turns into Ed Sheeran, DJ Khalad and finally Kendall Jenner, who immediately looks into her pants and exclaims:
Huh, I’m Kendall Jenner
I got a vagina, I’m gonna explore that right now (woo)
Holy sh*t, I got a vagina (uh), I’m gonna learn
I’m gonna understand the inner workings of a woman
Then she lies down on a bed to do just that… but the screen fades to black.
This is mainstream entertainment media today.
So how should you respond?
Don’t Freak Out
If you’ve heard me speak, you’ve heard these words come out of my mouth:
Don’t freak out!
Why? Because of my own personal failure in this area. As a parent I’ve overreacted countless times and it never worked out.
Apparently I’m not alone. When I interviewed hundreds of parents for my book, If I Had a Parenting Do Over, asking parents, “If you could go back in time and change one parenting practice, what would you do over?” …one of the most common responses was, “I’d avoid overreactions,” “I’d learn how to control my temper”, or as I titled my chapter on the subject, “I’d press pause.”
Here’s the way I think of it: remember the last time you overreacted and then after the smoke cleared and you spent time thinking about what a fool you were you came up with about 20 better ways to handle it? Does this kind of clear thinking necessitate overreaction in the first place? Or is it possible to just press pause, pray, run, walk, look through a family photo album, think through a response…. then react?
Try this.
If you discover your kids watching or listening to something inappropriate, first press pause by simply saying, “I want you to put your phone on the kitchen table, go up to your room and just work on your homework or read a book or something. I need time to think so I don’t say anything stupid.”
They’ll hate it.
And it will give them time to think.
Then when they come down convert your overreaction into interaction. Engage them in dialogue about the subject. Maybe ask, “So how should I respond?”
See what they come up with. This helps them think through discernment.
Then ask them, “How can we know what’s okay to put into our heads?”
This is a good question the whole family might need to explore. Open up your Bible to Colossians, Chapter 3 and see what God’s word says on the subject.
Don’t lecture. Just keep asking questions. Ask about specific verses that seem relevant:
What does this verse say?
What does that mean?
What does that look like in our home?
In a world so full of distractions, parents need to avoid overreaction and engage in meaningful interaction. (That’s a tweet for you.) Some parents get so caught up in blocking out lies that they forget to dialogue about truth. Don’t forget to point your kids toward truth.
We will not hide these truths from our children: We will tell the next generation about the glorious deeds of the Lord, about his power and his mighty wonders. – Psalm 78:4
I really feel sorry for kids today. This is the kind of thing they are bombarded with and have no idea how to handle. Most parents don’t know either, or sadly, don’t care. Our society is really mixed up and sending mixed messages all day every day. The advice you give is so good Jonathan. I’m past this stage with my own, but will navigate as much as I can by helping my kids thru this with their kids. For many years I was a lone voice in what I saw going on for teenagers. Parents letting kids go to lake houses 3-4 hours away with only a couple mom chaperones and we all know how that goes. My kids were told no. Not happening. And they respected that. Thanks for your work and commitment.
I appreciate the advice in this post. We have heard don’t freak out so much, and my husband and I always remind each other to not freak out, but then something happens and we freak out! There are some things you shared that we will definitely try. Thank you!