If the World Doesn’t End Saturday…

Posted on: 05/18/11 9:27 AM | by Jonathan McKee

I don’t know if you have a billboard in your town, but one of the major highways in my town has one of Harold Camping’s billboards talking about the end of the world being this Saturday.

Sigh.

I guess if you keep predicting Jesus’ return, some day you’ll eventually be right.

Well, if you live in PA and you believe that Friday night is the last time for repentance, then you can come hear me speak at a smalltown youth conference up in Meadville, PA (More about the conference here). I speak to kids Friday night, and then on Saturday, if Jesus doesn’t come by then, I’m doing my all day CONNECT workshop, training youth leaders how to build relationships with young people today.

I’ll be doing the same workshop this fall in Kansas, about an hour west of Wichita (more info on that here).

Oh… and shouldn’t we just live every day as if it was the last day? (just my two cents)

Three Buttons Every Parent Should Use

Posted on: 05/9/11 11:36 AM | by Jonathan McKee

This past weekend, on Mother’s Day, I spoke in all three services at a local church on the topic of parenting media saturated kids.

I decided to let my 13-year-old Ashley speak with me because I was talking specifically about teaching our kids lasting values, and I wanted to give them a glimpse of what that actually looks like. So Ashley shared candidly about what it’s like being a Christian kid living in a secular world that saturates teenagers with raunchy media. She talked openly about songs she likes, and how “racy songs” can be alluring to kids her age- especially when she hears them all day at school, sports, etc.

Ashley closed by encouraging these parents not to just try to be the “cool” parent that says yes to everything… instead, be the caring parent that cares enough to say “no, this doesn’t belong in our house.”

The audience really liked hearing from her (she did a great job). Then I chimed in and gave some application of what it looks like to build values into our kids “as we get up, as we walk along the road, as we go to bed…” Fun stuff.

This month, “More to Life” Magazine has posted and article I wrote for them on their MY HOME section of the web site, an article titled, “Three Buttons Every Parent Should Use.” This article gives a glimpse of some of what Ashley and I shared on Mother’s Day. Here’s just a peek:

Today’s parents often wonder if they’re truly making a difference in the lives of their kids, or if they should just throw in the towel. I assure you, don’t give up. Research unanimously reveals that parents who care enough to spend time with their kids and help their kids make good choices are the parents who become the number one influence in their kids’ lives. (I cite numerous examples of this research in my book, Candid Confessions of an Imperfect Parent).

Many parents might not be so quick to throw up their hands and quit if they were just given a few tools to help them navigate this intimidating arena of 21st century parenting. In a world of Facebook, iPods and MTV, how can we connect with our media-saturated teens and tweens?

I’ve found it extremely helpful to use three buttons…

CLICK HERE FOR THE ENTIRE ARTICLE.

Gaining Trust, Connecting, Sharing…

Posted on: 05/5/11 3:10 PM | by Jonathan McKee

Yesterday I shared with you a snippet or two from an interview I did where I was asked about everything from “taking care of visitors to our youth group” to “spiritual growth in today’s teenagers.”

You can catch my responses to those questions in yesterday’s blog, PART I.

Here’s the remainder of my answers during that interview. PART II:

Michael – OK
-What are some of the best ways to gain the trust of new unchurched students?

JONATHAN’S ANSWER:
Go beyond shaking hands and exchanging names. Actually take an interest in them. Sit with them. Invite them to join us in our small group. “We’re going to coffee afterwards- come with us.” “Text me- I’ll text you this week.”

I could go on, but honestly, my entire book CONNECT is devoted to helping us learn how to do this.

Jason – Dallas
– In your book “Connect” you talk a lot about getting to know kids on a one-on-one basis. Do you believe its possible to become so connected with students that they see you more as a peer and you lose your influence in their lives

JONATHAN’S ANSWER:
I think parents struggle with this as well. “If I spend too much time being their buddy, will I not be seen as their parent?”

I wonder if Christ was accused of that when he descended to earth to become human.

There’s no danger in humbling yourself to be relational- to listen, to laugh, to play. The only danger would be if you lower your standards and try to be something you’re not, or allow yourself to do something inappropriate in effort to “be accepted.” This is a twisting of a good thing. There’s never anything wrong with a coach, a parent, a teacher, or a youth worker spending time listening to a kid share their heart, throwing a Frisbee, cheering together at a football game, laughing through a comedy. I bet more kids wish their dads would be there to do these activities. These activities actually earn trust and help the kid respect dad, or coach, or pastor Jason when he has to put the foot down and say, “Sorry, but you’re not going to do that.”

Ashley – WI
-How can we equip and train our youth to witness and share the gospel with nonbelievers in their everyday lives?

JONATHAN’S ANSWER:
I think the reason most kids don’t share their faith is because they have nothing to share.

If we allow God to fill our cup, he’ll overflow it so much that it will spill everywhere and get everyone around us smelling like coffee.

My friend Kierra is so in love with God. She’s not an evangelist by any means. She’s just in love with God. Everywhere she go, she literally “reeks” God. She can’t help but talk about him. She went into a computer store to get her Dell fixed… as you need to do with any PC. A Muslim guy worked the counter. After talking with Kierra for just two minutes, he couldn’t help but say, “You’re really religious, yes?” It’s not because she wore cross ear rings or a shirt that said, “Kiss me, I’m Christian.” It’s because she couldn’t even turn in her computer without talking about how much she prayed that it would be fixable and how much she needed it for ministry, etc.

Next thing she knows, she’s in a conversation about God.

Everybody worships something. Think about it. What do you worship? Movies? Cars? Yourself?

We’ve all met people who worship their cars. All they can talk about is cars. You can’t have a conversation with this person without it touching the subject of automobiles.

Some people are hung up with their own sexuality. They can’t finish a sentence without talking about who they are sexually.

Kierra was that way with God. And guess what… she ended up talking with people about God.

We need to introduce people into a loving God, let them experience who he is so that God’s hope will be overflowing out of them. It’s only then that verses like I Peter 3:15-18 make sense when

1 Peter 3:15 (NIV)
15 But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect.
So many people miss that in the verse. They concentrate on the “always be prepared” and they miss the golden nugget of how the conversation will start in the first place. “ask you to give a a reason for the hope that you have…”

Why would someone ask you to give a reason for the hope that you have???

Because they see it!

Now that they see it… now talk!

Oh… and as for the question, how can we train and equip… that’s how. Get them to “reek” hope! But yes.. then when someone asks them, “What’s different about you?” “What’s that hope?” then we need to be ready to answer. So read a book like my DO THEY RUN WHEN THEY SEE YOU COMING? Which is all about sharing our faith with “unchurched” people. Or Greg Stier’s “DARE TO SHARE” book. Great ways to articulate your faith.

If you enjoyed this, you can listen to the entire podcast here on the Students and Culture website.

Students and Culture Interview

Posted on: 05/4/11 10:19 AM | by Jonathan McKee

I was interviewed recently on the Students and Culture podcast… some of you might have wanted an opportunity to peek in on that interview. For those that don’t have the time to listen to it, I’ve provided some of the highlights of it transcripted below.

Fun conversation. I start by giving a brief (60 second) history of THE SOURCE FOR YOUTH MINISTRY and how it came to be (by accident, actually). Then we chatted about churches reaching beyond their church walls… then I answered the following questions:

  – What is the best thing student groups can do to have return visitors?

  – If you only had one lesson left to teach a group of students, what would you teach and why?

  – What are some of the best ways to gain the trust of new unchurched students?

  – In your book “Connect” you talk a lot about getting to know kids on a one-on-one basis. Do you believe it’s possible to become so connected with students that they see you more as a peer and you lose your influence in their lives?

  – How can we equip and train our youth to witness and share the gospel with nonbelievers in their everyday lives?

You can listen to the podcast here on the Students and Culture website, or if you would prefer to just read the highlights, here’s a snippet of what I answered to those questions:

Jason – OK asked:
-What is the best thing student groups can do to have return visitors?

JONATHAN’S ANSWER:
First- this question assumes that people are actually visiting! An aside… I think we need to be proactive to think of outreach as reaching more than those who actually DO show up. But yes, let’s definitely try to KEEP the ones that actually DO show up.

Last year a church brought me in to train their student leaders, but I first got an opportunity to attend their morning youth service. The first thing I did was simply sit in the back of the room and observe. I especially paid attention to “the door.” I tell youth workers this all the time. If you ever get a chance to just take a week where you can just sit in the back and watch the door– you’ll learn a lot. It’s fun to watch kids come in and look around. You can almost see what they’re thinking. “Where do I go? Are any of my friends here?” Sometimes, after a moments hesitation, you’ll actually see kids turn around a leave.”

What are we doing to make people think, “I belong!” I’m welcome here. I’m safe.

In my new book MINISTRY BY TEENAGERS, David gives an example of a youth ministry that decided to be proactive about making new kids feel like they belong. They did this with colored name tags, of all thing…  our book is full of ideas to do just that.

Noah – KY
– If you only had one lesson left to teach a group of students, what would you teach and why?

JONATHAN’S ANSWER:
It depends on the students I’m talking to. I know that might sound like a copout answer, but I just need to at least know who I’m talking to. For example, am I speaking to a bunch of unchurched kids on campus? Or am I speaking at a Christian camp?

ON CAMPUS- I think I’d give them a talk that basically address the feeling we all get when we’ve tried to find fulfillment in all the temporary thrills of life, and when they don’t work, we finally proclaim, “There’s gotta be more than this!!” Basically, I speak to them about the unfulfilling temporary vs. the permanent love of God that comes through knowing Jesus Christ in a personal relationship.That passage so accurately describes the lies of this world, “lies that sound like the truth.”

AT A CAMP- I’d probably talk about the importance of letting God sit in the driver’s seat of our life- and what that actually looks like. I’m speaking in layman’s terms here. This is actually a lesson on how we need to give the Holy Spirit control. How the fruits of the spirit are not things we are to “TRY” to do, but qualities that flow from us when we let the Spirit in our life- when we “let God drive.” When we let him control the radio… you get the idea.

Noah – KY asked a second question:
– What do you see as the biggest deterrent to spiritual growth in today’s teens?

JONATHAN’S ANSWER:
We allow ourselves to be distracted by the world’s lies. In Ephesians, Paul talks about what it will be like when we mature in Christ. He says…

Ephesians 4:14-15 (NLT)
14 Then we will no longer be immature like children. We won’t be tossed and blown about by every wind of new teaching. We will not be influenced when people try to trick us with lies so clever they sound like the truth.
15 Instead, we will speak the truth in love, growing in every way more and more like Christ, who is the head of his body, the church

We get comfy like David (II Samuel 11) did when he decided to give in to laziness- sleep in while his men were fighting. Give into lust- and turn on late night cable tv- women bathing- great view from the rooftops. Feed those desires- invite her over. Give into adultery. Sleep with her. Give into deception- plan a coverup where it looks like Uriah got her pregnant. And finally… commit murder.

I’ll post the rest of it in my next blog.

You can listen to the entire interview here.

Leadership Lessons from the Shirtless Guy

Posted on: 04/27/11 3:52 PM | by Jonathan McKee

My dad sent me this video, a great little piece about “leadership” and, more importantly, how a movement is made. Dad and I are always looking out for good leadership discussion and training pieces for our NEW BREED training workshops.

This is a great little tool (regardless of how shoddy the camera work is) to provoke discussion at a leaders’ meeting.

(CLICK HERE if you don’t see the embedded video)

I love the following three statements. These would be great to hand out on a piece of paper to your leadership team and simply ask: Agree or disagree? Why? Are there scriptural truths to back up this idea?

1. Remember the importance of nurturing the first few followers as equals. It’s about the movement, not you!

2. It was the first follower transformed the “lone nut” into a leader.

3. We’re told that we all need to be leaders, but that would be really ineffective. The best way to make a movement, if you really care, is to courageously follow and show others how to follow. When you find a lone nut doing something great, have the guts to be the first person to stand up and join in.

Jonathan… or Snookie?

Posted on: 04/26/11 12:11 PM | by Jonathan McKee

“Well… I’m cheaper than Snookie!”

Yeah, that’s probably not a great place to set the bar.    🙂   (more on Snookie speaking in a moment)

As most of you know, I do quite a bit of speaking and training around the country, usually not more than twice a month away from home (simply because I don’t want to be the “deadbeat dad” speaker guy). So here’s a glimpse inside the life of someone who travels speaking and training. Each of us do it a little bit differently. But two things have never changed for me in the last 10 years: my price for a training or parent workshop, and the way I book.

1. MY PRICE: For the last 10 years, I’ve never raised the price of my workshops. Gas is more, flights are more… but Jonathan is still $2,000 total for workshops, that includes all travel… everything. All that money goes 100% to our ministry and the free resources and training we provide. My board and I have made an effort to keep that price as low as possible since “equipping” is a huge part of our vision. (My “speaking” and “keynote” prices are a little more, but training is always only $2,000.)

But every once in a while I get someone who doesn’t understand the price. They wonder why I can’t fly from California to Alabama and speak for a week for $300. I’ve even been told that if I had more faith, I’d speak for free.

Sigh.

Well, earlier this month Jersey Shore’s Snookie was booked to speak at Rudgers for a price of $32,000… and parents were outraged. I don’t blame em.’ That’s $10,000 more than annual tuition there! (Fox News).

Even though most people actually find my prices cheap, I’ve had several experiences where people tried to book me and were surprised at why I’d be $2,000 to come in and train. I simply tell them to feel free to call some of the other people who do what I do and check prices. Usually I get a call back in a day or two with a, “Okay… you’re cheap. Let’s book you!”

2. NO AGENT: For the last 10 years, I’ve never used a speaking “agent” because I really like the personal interaction and communication with the people that I’m ministering with.

About 15 years ago I was the guy booking speakers and bands. Every time, without exception, that I had a problem with a speaker or a band… it was because of miscommunication. “Your agent said that…” or “I thought you were supposed to…”

In my book about programming events I spend a whole chapter talking about booking speakers and another chapter about booking bands. Those chapters are filled with hilarious stories of miscommunication and disaster. Let’s just say, I always want to make sure that those of us doing ministry together are working as a team together.

WHAT ABOUT YOU? What are some of the experiences you’ve had good and bad with speakers/trainers?

TV Still Rules

Posted on: 03/24/11 4:06 PM | by Jonathan McKee

I’m preparing to teach two training workshops this weekend, a “Discipleship” workshop to the teachers/faculty at a Christian school tomorrow, and then my parenting workshop in Eastern PA on Sunday. Doing a little research, I thought I’d check in on the ongoing battle between internet and TV, both media channels vying for our kids’ attention.

This is always an interesting study. Common perception is that kids spend much more time on the internet each day. But time and time again, to most people’s surprise, TV proves to be the primary media “time sponge” for young people.

In Kaiser’s huge media consumption report last year, kids averaged about 90 minutes per day on the internet, where they soaked up a good 4.5 hours on the TV immersed in American Idol, Jersey Shore, Family Guy, etc. (MTV is often the most watched network by young people)

Nielson’s brand new State of the Media report (free registration required to view whole report) reveals just how much TV kids were absorbing each day in quarter four. Check out this chart– the monthly hours of each age group in the last quarter of 2010:   (notice that my age group watches waaaaaaay more TV than our kids)

If you combine the top two rows, 12-17 year-olds are averaging almost 3 hours and 44 minutes per day of TV. About 6 months ago Nielson was reporting 12-17 year olds average about of 3 hours 46 minutes per day. Not much of a shift.

Wondering what people are watching? This past week American Idol still ruled broadcast TV, and Jersey Shore still reigned supreme on Cable.

Sigh.

Parenting Book and Training Workshop

Posted on: 03/16/11 10:52 AM | by Jonathan McKee

You’ve been seeing a lot of great resources for parents coming from us lately… and here’s a couple more you will definitely want to know about.

1. My new book, Candid Confessions of an Imperfect Parent:

I’m getting a shipment of these in just a couple weeks– before they hit the shelves everywhere else. So we just put them up for pre-order on our site- I’m signing every book that’s pre-ordered! (Sorry for some of you who tried to order these earlier this week- we had a glitch on our website book page- it’s ALL FIXED now!)

So pre-order that now and I’ll personally ship you a signed copy as soon as I get the shipment at the end of this month!

2. My Parenting Workshop:

I’ve already got six of these workshops booked across the country for 2011. Check my speaking calendar (about halfway down this pageand see if I’ll be near you. If not, contact me and see about bringing me out to your city.

A week from Sunday I’ll be near Harrisburg, PA doing a parenting workshop. If you’re within driving distance from there, come out to see me at that workshop. I’ll have copies of my new book with me. Here’s more info on that workshop.

An Insane Sale and a Freebie…

Posted on: 03/2/11 5:30 PM | by Jonathan McKee

For some reason my blog never was sent out via FEEDBURNER to all my email subscribers this morning. Weird! It only went out via RSS feed. I’m plugging it again below so that my email readers don’t miss out:

A lot of buzz about my 10-Minute Talks book lately, so I thought I’d give you all an insane deal… including a freebie. More on that in a minute.

I actually heard a youth pastor give one of the talks from this book a few weeks ago– then printed out the small group questions from the free supplemental CD that comes with the book. As I saw the kids responding to the talks and the small group questions, I remember thinking, “This is cool! I wonder how much venders are actually selling this book for?” (yeah, I think these things!)  But seriously, it’s funny looking at the variety of prices that people sell your books for around the web.

Right now BORDERS is selling it for retail which is $24.99, YS is selling it for $21.24, Amazon has it for $18.24. So I had my web guy go in and drop it down to almost 40% off. We’re selling it for just $15.99… that includes the supplemental CD that has all the transcripts of the talks and a complete small group curriculum– small questions and scripture that go with each talk (I include a link to sample talk with the small group questions from the book and CD on this page).

But what the heck… I’ll even throw in another bonus. The first 10 of you– my blog readers– to order the book today… no… I’ll do better than that. I’ll do it for ALL of you just this week. For EVERY person that orders the book this week and puts MR. or MRS. or MS. in front of their name (when you fill out your mailing address), I’ll throw in a free copy of my book, THE TOP 12 RESOURCES THAT YOUTH WORKERS WANT. I’ll do that all week with the order of any of my books, for those that follow directions.  🙂

Buy it from us RIGHT HERE.

The First Ten of You…

Posted on: 03/1/11 1:23 PM | by Jonathan McKee

A lot of buzz about my 10-Minute Talks book lately, so I thought I’d give you all an insane deal… including a freebie. More on that in a minute.

I actually heard a youth pastor give one of the talks from this book a few weeks ago– then printed out the small group questions from the free supplemental CD that comes with the book. As I saw the kids responding to the talks and the small group questions, I remember thinking, “This is cool! I wonder how much venders are actually selling this book for?” (yeah, I think these things!)  But seriously, it’s funny looking at the variety of prices that people sell your books for around the web.

Right now BORDERS is selling it for retail which is $24.99, YS is selling it for $21.24, Amazon has it for $18.24. So I had my web guy go in and drop it down to almost 40% off. We’re selling it for just $15.99… that includes the supplemental CD that has all the transcripts of the talks and a complete small group curriculum– small questions and scripture that go with each talk (I include a link to sample talk with the small group questions from the book and CD on this page).

But what the heck… I’ll even throw in another bonus. The first 10 of you– my blog readers– to order the book today… no… I’ll do better than that. I’ll do it for ALL of you just this week. For EVERY person that orders the book this week and puts MR. or MRS. or MS. in front of their name (when you fill out your mailing address), I’ll throw in a free copy of my book, THE TOP 12 RESOURCES THAT YOUTH WORKERS WANT. I’ll do that all week with the order of any of my books, for those that follow directions.  🙂

Buy it from us RIGHT HERE.