Top 10 Games of the Last DECADE!

Posted on: 12/31/09 10:22 AM | by Jonathan McKee

Wow… forget looking back just one year… how about looking back a whole decade!

My son is quite a “gamer,” so I found this particular list fun. It’s the Top 10 Games of the Decade from Yahoo Games.

One thing I liked about the list was how so many innocent games made the cut. Mario, Wii Fit, Wii Sports… good stuff. It also reveals that “game play” is still important.

This list also gives a pretty good glimpse of youth and gaming culture. With game giants like HALO (remember all the craze with each release?), and Guitar Hero (#1 for so long, fastest to reach the $1 billion mark, evening beating out the Grand Theft Auto releases… yeah!).

But unfortunately, the list also reflects the sad reality of our culture with its number 1 pick, Grand Theft Auto III, a game that gives into every fleshly urge imaginable. You’ve heard me blog about one of these games before, and may have even read David’s Youth Culture Window Article about 2008’s release of Grand Theft Auto 4.

But hey, I was happy to only see one game that truly disturbed me in a list of the decade’s top 10 games. Not bad!

Click here for the slideshow/list of the Top 10 Games of the Decade.

(ht to David R. Smith)

Brand New Report on Minors Sexting

Posted on: 12/15/09 11:48 AM | by Jonathan McKee

Emphasis on “brand new” and emphasis on “minors.”

Yes, in the last year we’ve heard an abundance of reports about “sexting” … that’s when teenagers decide to use their mobile phones to send sexual text messages or images to each other. At noon today (hence the words “brand new”), Pew Internet released their newest report, Teens and Sexting, by Amanda Lenhart, their Senior Research Specialist.

The glaring number that popped right off the page at me was 4%. That’s right– this report shows only “4% of cell-owning teens ages 12-17 say they have sent sexually suggestive nude or nearly nude images of themselves to someone else via text messages.”

The 4% popped out at me because this is by far the lowest number I’ve seen yet and I wanted to know if it was accurate. (Just a week or so ago I blogged about another new poll citing “more than a quarter of young people have been involved in sexting.”)

First, let me note that people tend to love to post the “bigger” or more shocking numbers when these reports are released. Take, for example, CNN’s article on the subject released today. Their headline: “15 Percent of Teens Get Sexual Text Messages.” I guess that sounds a lot better than a mere 4% who send them.  🙂

That being said, I really thought that 4% sounded low.

That’s why I, first, read the entire report, available as a PDF download, including the section on the study’s “methodology.” Then… I couldn’t help it. I had to call Pew Internet and ask them myself. I dialed their number and to my surprise got Amanda Lenhart on the phone. After introducing myself and thanking her for her report, I asked, “Why the disparity between these numbers and other reports?” I quickly sited the MTV/AP study, a study that this Pew Internet report even cited. In that study they reported that 19% of teens ages 13-18 had sent a sexually suggestive text message or email with nude or nearly-nude photos. It seemed that 4% and 19% weren’t very close.

She was not only happy to engage in a dialogue about the study, she was very articulate in her responses to my questions. The first thing she highlighted was that the MTV/AP study included 18 and 19 year-olds, where her report only went up to age 17, and that really changes the numbers. I agreed, noting that her own report revealed 8% of 17-year-olds and sent sexually provocative images via text and 30% had received them. The older kids are, the more they do this. It’s fairly clear that 18 and 19-year-olds really boost the percentages.

Looking back at the more recent AP-MTV poll that I blogged about just last week, that report (citing “more than a quarter of young people have been involved in sexting”) was a study of 14-24-year-olds. It’s pretty important to notice those ages.

She explained that in her report she wanted to highlight the sexting by “minors.” So that difference in age accounts for much of the difference in percentages.

Her report spoke to the importance of this issue specifically with minors because of the laws and legislation emerging to deal with the issue. The report details several incidents where teenagers were accused, prosecuted or even listed as sex offenders for sending nude pictures to other minors.

We went on to talk about the methodology of the study. Her study was a phone study that required the consent of a parent to talk to the minor. I asked Ms. Lenhart blatantly, “Don’t you think that might affect your results, the fact that you are only talking to teenagers whose parents connected you with them?” I shared my personal experience with the large percentage of troubled teens whose relationships with their parents were less than civil. I don’t think any of those kids would have ever made it to the phone. I asked her, “Is this survey missing those kids?”

She contended that many of the kids who were surveyed seemed reluctant at first to even want to talk on the phone. She felt that their survey reached all kinds of kids. She went on to describe how accurate these samplings can be.

She summarized by saying that she didn’t think the numbers were that far off from other studies like the MTV/AP report when you take into consideration the age difference and the plus or minus 4% accuracy that most these studies have.

I was pretty convinced, once talking with her. The only thing that still has me skeptical is the phone call methodology (you can read all about it in the report). I’m not expert when it comes to surveys, but as a guy who has spent a lot of time on campus, it seems to me the best way to do these studies would be in cooperation with the schools, using a random mix of schools and a random sampling of kids (of all socio-economic backgrounds, different races, different academic abilities) … pull them from class and interview them. I would probably even try a personal interview (face to face) followed by an anonymous interview at a computer screen where the kids are assured that their answers are kept anonymous- noting the difference between the results as a whole.

Just my two cents.

Anyway, I encourage you to read her whole report. Fascinating stuff. Here’s a glimpse at the overview:

The report also shared some interesting new tidbits, including the newest mobile phone use data (an update from the data I shared just yesterday!), with the 2009 statistic that now 58% of 12-year-olds own a cell phone (I’ll have to use that stat with my 12-year-old daughter now when she says that all her friends own cell phones. Dang. It keeps changing in her favor!)

Teens and Mobile Phones Over the Past 5 Years

Posted on: 12/14/09 11:09 AM | by Jonathan McKee

As a parent of two teenagers and a tween, I can assure you that “a cell phone” is still the hot item on the Christmas list of kids today. It’s definitely on my 12-year-old’s Christmas list. She claims that she’s the only one without it.

Little did she know that I could tell her exactly what percentage of her friends have one!  🙂  Yes, 51% of 12-year olds own cell phones. So yes, she’s in the minority, but just barely!

The fascinating fact is how much this percentage has grown in the last 5 years. In 2004, only 18% of 12-year-olds owned a cell phone.

Where am I getting this? Pew Internet just did a study a few months back looking back at teen mobile use over the last five years. Fascinating report! It’s amazing to see the growth in teen mobile phone use! (note: a few weeks ago I blogged about teen media use and showed a similar Neilson report, although that chart showed what percentage of kids get their first cell phone at what age).

Look at the change from 2004 (dark blue) to now (light blue) for ages 12-17:

This entire report is interesting. It includes teens daily activities on a phone, the demographics of teen cell phone users, how many teen cell phone users compared to adults, etc.

I find this chart even more fascinating:

Forget the ages for a second. Look at the mobile time (dark blue) vs. face-to-face time (light blue)! See how much more kids are relying on technology than good ol’ face-to-face time? The funny thing is, kids are becoming less comfortable talking face-to-face.

I keep seeing this fact popping up in new studies. In Chapter 2 of my CONNECT book (in stock within a week) I touched on that very subject, highlighting the decrease in “face-to-face” time and the void that it’s creating in kids lives (I actually blogged about that a while back- people today have less close friends). I think it’s crucial as parents and youth workers to connect with kids “face-to-face.” This is slowly becoming more difficult in today’s society… hence the need for a book helping adults connect with kids.   🙂

Avatar

Posted on: 12/11/09 4:49 PM | by Jonathan McKee

I get to go to quite a few screenings… and I haven’t been to one this “regulated” in years. (Movie reviewers only, no guests, one screening, no cameras, etc.) But hey… this is James Freaking Cameron!

Think about it. We haven’t seen a film from Cameron since Titanic, the biggest box office success ever! So you can imagine my excitement when I heard that I got a chance to screen Avatar. Congruently, you can probably relate to my high expectations.

Look at Cameron’s repertoire of films: Terminator, Aliens, The Abyss, T2, True Lies, Titanic… not a dud in the bunch (a couple of rentals, but not a dud). How do you follow up the greatest selling film of all time?

I’m actually not allowed to post my review of the film until next Friday, the 18th (told you it was stringent), but I’m allowed to make some broad comments about my screening experience.

First, I’ll tell you that the film is definitely worthy of going to the theatre for the release. A mere glimpse of the preview on the official site will tell you that. The film is over 2 hours and 40 minutes long and I didn’t want to miss a minute. I attended the screening right after lunch and had to pee so bad two hours into it I almost went in a cup! (I didn’t… I sprinted!)

I’d love to give you details, but I can’t yet. I’ll just tell you that there were a few scenes that were visually amazing. The fantasy genre has proven to be well liked by audiences in the last decade, and I think the whole “avatar” premise will be welcomed by an extremely “virtual” generation.

But, all that said, it was hard for the film to rise to my expectations. This film is the “little brother” of “the captain of the football team.” It doesn’t matter how good or bad it is… it will always be compared to Titanic.

I called my son as soon as the screening was done and started giving him the play-by-play. I told him of scenes he would love and scenes that I thought they could have improved. I told him it was enjoyable, but a little preachy and too new age for me at times (I didn’t tell you that… I just told him that.. wink, wink.)

The main aspect I have to vent about is the choice to do 3D. (I don’t even know if I’m allowed to talk about this) I’m really disappointed they went 3D. I’ll be honest: I’ve never enjoyed a 3D film, ever! I was sitting at home in front of an HD screen literally 3 hours after the screening and the preview came on. I thought the preview on my HD screen looked better than I had just seen on the big screen wearing the stupid 3D glasses. I hate 3D. And there weren’t really any great 3D moments. So the 3D definitely effected my perception of the film.

That all being said… the film was really good overall.

I’ll share my official review next week with what I liked and didn’t like. I’ll also share my “two cents” on how appropriate it is (or isn’t) for kids. The only thing I’ll say now is that there is a lot of weird religious themes throughout the film that parents will want to talk about with their kids, especially in today’s culture of mix and match religions (just saw an article on that very subject here yesterday).

Helping Kids Process Grief

Posted on: 12/10/09 10:12 AM | by Jonathan McKee

Tragedy is a reality. We all face it at times. The question we might have as parents and youth workers is, “How can we help our kids process this kind of grief?”

My city has been dealing with this recently as three young people were killed in a car wreck. The intriguing thing I’m noticing is the different advice we’re hearing about helping kids deal with this.

Our Sacramento Bee newspaper offered some interesting observations in their recent article about the incident, noting that teenagers don’t grieve like adults. The article contends that teenagers bury their feelings deep because of the pressure to look good and seem confident.

I’m not sure I agree with that generalization at all. I have seen plenty of evidence to the contrary, where kids will almost have complete meltdowns over even trivial matters. Youth workers like to call this “drama.” We’ve all seen it. Billy breaks up with Ali and Ali reacts no better than “Bella” in the recent movie New Moon… complete emotional breakdown.

I think some teenagers probably do have a propensity to repress feelings or “gunnysack,” but I wouldn’t try to rubberstamp that as a diagnosis for all teenagers. It would be difficult to generalize “all students” as grieving one way. Students are so diverse in how they process things.

But the same Bee article also noted something I found quite interesting- something I definitely have observed mainstream- the desire teenagers have to just be together and process grief with their friends.

“A lot of times, kids don’t necessarily want to talk, they just want to be together,” said Lissa Morgan, counselor at Rocklin. “They just want to go into the room and feel supported by one another.”

A steady rotation of students filled a conference room at Rocklin on Monday and Tuesday, where chaplains and counselors were on call. Most students sat quietly, Morgan said, or signed a poster with notes to Pak, a junior who died in the car crash.

Students at Folsom also taped a banner to an outside wall for Shaw, a senior who died in the crash. Throughout the day, students picked up Crayola markers to write notes or draw pictures. Or they gathered at the wall to share memories of Shaw.

“You didn’t have to know him for this to affect you,” said Yasi Saderi, 17, senior class president, who plans to give the completed banner to Shaw’s mother. “We wanted everyone to express what they felt.”

The wall is especially effective for teens, White said, because it gives them permission to express their feelings without being put on the spot. Reading others’ comments helps teens understand their own feelings.

I emailed this article to my buddy Lane Palmer to ask his two cents. Lane has a counseling background and was a youth pastor in Columbine during the 1999 incident. Lane, a regular contributor to our website, has written articles for us about dealing with school shooting tragedies and how to process this kind of grief as a group. Lane chimed in on this particular Sacramento Bee article and how students can process grief in a healthy way:

Every teen to some extent will go through the grieving period during adolescence, so youth workers need to be aware and ready to help.  It could be the death of a parent, friend suicide, or even a grieving of moving out of childhood.  It’s a great opportunity to help students understand and process both the joys and loss that relationships and life brings.

I agree that letting the teens just ‘hang out’ and process on a peer level is important, but equally important is encouraging them to process their feelings in some way- talking, journaling, drawing, etc.  With some of the Columbine students, I just sat and let the conversation flow.

Avoid any ‘you need to be strong’ or ‘you need to move on’ stuff.  Every teen grieves in a different way and time.

I think hanging a huge butcher paper in the youth room and make a general opportunity to write thoughts, names, struggles, etc. would be a great thing for any youth group

Great advice from Lane.

You can check out the entire Sacramento Bee article here.

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Sexting and the Teenage Brain

Posted on: 12/4/09 10:30 AM | by Jonathan McKee

I think sexting is probably one of the biggest youth culture issues addressed by the news-media in the last year. Our ministry has written articles on the subject, (including this article about how to wade through “media hype”) and I’ve blogged about it numerous times, even this week when we saw another suicide that began from a sexting incident.

Now MTV/Associated Press has taken a poll and shared their findings. I always find it ironic that MTV is doing these studies. I understand why they want to know this information– so they can better understand the generation that they are pimping their smut too— but I just wonder how MTV execs sleep at night when they discover the truth from all these polls.

Even Conan O Brian joked about this in his monologue last night, commenting that MTV was recommending that kids don’t participate in sexting. He jested, “MTV says there’s a time and a place to share these intimate moments… and that’s on one of our 17 reality shows!”    🙂

Anyway… the AP article reporting on this study shares that more than a quarter of young people have been involved in sexting in some form. I also found it interesting that only about half of the kids surveyed saw the issue as a big problem.

The article goes on to talk about the teen brain, arguing that teenage brains are not quite mature enough to make good decisions:

Research shows teenage brains are not quite mature enough to make good decisions consistently. By the mid-teens, the brain’s reward centers, the parts involved in emotional arousal, are well-developed, making teens more vulnerable to peer pressure.

But it is not until the early 20s that the brain’s frontal cortex, where reasoning connects with emotion, enabling people to weigh consequences, has finished forming.

Beyond feeling invincible, young people also have a much different view of sexual photos that might be posted online, Bogle said. They don’t think about the idea that those photos might wind up in the hands of potential employers or college admissions officers, she said.

“Sometimes they think of it as a joke; they have a laugh about it,” Bogle said. “In some cases, it’s seen as flirtation. They’re thinking of it as something far less serious and aren’t thinking of it as consequences down the road or who can get hold of this information. They’re also not thinking about worst-case scenarios that parents might worry about.”

You can read the whole AP article here.

This seems to coincide with earlier research about the brain- I talked about the teenage brain a few years back, with my two cents and a biblical response.

Bottom line: continue to talk with our kids about these issues.

(ht to KJ for the AP article)

The Ugly… Ugly Truth

Posted on: 12/1/09 3:53 PM | by Jonathan McKee

Last night Lori and I rented the comedy romance The Ugly Truth with Gerard Butler and Katherine Heigl. I needed to review it anyway for our MOVIE REVIEW page, and I always enjoy a good romantic comedy with Lori.

My thoughts?

Very ugly… very little truth.

Some people might be quick to tell me, “Hey Jonathan, it’s rated R! What did you expect?” First, this won’t be the first time I’ve said it, I don’t put much weight in the MPAA’s rating system. The Ugly Truth is “rated R for sexual content and language.” That would also describe Jerry McGuire or When Harry Met Sally, both films that are not only “true” and real, but also are very pro-marriage.

The Ugly Truth was none of that. Looking at the preview, I should have foreseen that.

Here’s a snippet from my official movie review:

Abby (Katherine Heigl) is a romantically challenged morning show producer who is appalled by Mike (Gerard Butler), a chauvinist with a cable call-in show called “The Ugly Truth.” When Abby’s station faces the reality of low ratings, they hire Mike to come and liven up her show with his raw, risqué antics. In other words, they sold out, like most of today’s media does.
 
This attempt at a romantic comedy was simply one raunchy gag after the next, and sprinkled with the typical subtle lies that promote today’s “hook-up” culture.
 
Audiences who enjoyed Knocked Up and the like will probably enjoy this film as well. Audiences who don’t enjoy non-stop locker-room humor will want to skip this insult to their intelligence.
 
Take the moment early in the film when Abby is climbing a tree to save her cat, only to see in her “hunk” of a neighbor’s window, seeing him get out of the shower. Of course the branch breaks, she loudly falls, catching herself by her feet so we can see her hang upside down in her panties, and him run out in a towel to see what all the hullabaloo is all about (I’ve been waiting for years to use that word in a sentence). She somehow grabs his towel off, leaving him standing naked with his crotch in her face.
 
Did the writers of Three’s Company write this?
 
Don’t waste your time. Skip it.

Another Sexting-related Bullying Suicide

Posted on: 11/29/09 9:36 PM | by Jonathan McKee

David, my director of content development for TheSource4YM.com just emailed me a sad article about an incident only 15 miles from his house in Tampa, FL.

Many of you have heard horror stories about sexting- I’ve blogged about them before. It usually goes like this: girl sends boyfriend nude photo. Girlfriend and boyfriend eventually break up. Boyfriend passes around nude photo. Girlfriend is shamed and reacts… sometimes in suicide.

That’s similar to Hope’s story, as told here by the St. Petersburg Times:

At the end of the school year at Beth Shields Middle School, the taunting got so bad that Hope Witsell’s friends surrounded her between classes. They escorted her down hallways like human shields, fending off insults such as “whore” and “slut.” A few days before, Hope had forwarded a nude photo of herself to a boy she liked — a practice widely known as “sexting.” The image found its way to other students, who forwarded it to their friends. Soon the nude photo was circulating through cell phones at Shields Middle and Lennard High School, according to multiple students at both schools. “Tons of people talk about me behind my back and I hate it because they call me a whore!” Hope wrote in her journal. “And I can’t be a whore i’m too inexperienced. So secretly TONS of people hate me … ” School authorities learned of the nude photo around the end of the school year and suspended Hope for the first week of eighth-grade, which started in August. About two weeks after she returned to school, a counselor observed cuts on Hope’s legs and had her sign a “no-harm” contract, in which Hope agreed to tell an adult if she felt inclined to hurt herself, her family says. The next day, Hope hanged herself in her bedroom. She was 13.

So sad.

Pray for Hope’s family.

And keep talking with our kids about these kinds of issues (we’ve outlined some ways to do this in this article and even provided discussion outlines for you like the one here).

Will Adam Lambert’s Antics Wake Up Parents?

Posted on: 11/24/09 1:38 AM | by Jonathan McKee

It seemed like just another typical American Music Awards. Rihanna revealed…too much, Jay Z rapped about how great he is, Shakira did her little hip thing with a mic stand (I think I saw the mic stand smoking a cigarette just moments later), Gaga… well… was Gaga. But then, to top the night off, Adam gave one of the most graphically sexual performances I have ever seen on network TV.

I’m not talking about one incident…it was throughout the whole performance. Lambert grabbed one of his dancers head and simulated oral sex, he kissed a male band member in true ‘Britney-Madonna’ fashion, dragged dancers on a leash, and even flipped off the audience. Apparently West coast audiences didn’t get to see some of the antics. (You can read more details here if you’re interested)

It seems that artists are testing the waters and seeing just how far they can push the envelope. That’s what the rest of the entertainment industry is doing (Hey! Normal sex isn’t even selling big anymore, let’s try threesomes!)

The thing that has me scratching my head is, “Why are people so shocked?” Don’t get me wrong… I’m glad that people are raising the questions as to if this is appropriate to show on TV. I’m just laughing that people have no problem with everything else we allow on TV.

Is this really that surprising?

Lambert wasn’t shy about retorting to some of the criticism, calling it a double standard since women performers have been “pushing the envelope” for decades.

Some people are definitely upset, with almost every media outlet chiming in about the incident. USA TODAY is taking a poll: entertainment, or over the top?

I definitely think it’s over the top. But so was Shakira… so were about 20 moments during the last MTV VMA’s, so is every episode of CBS’s Two and a Half Men.

Hmmmmmmm.

Maybe this will wake up some of the parents around the world as to what we are teaching this young generation.

My Two Cents After Seeing Twilight’s New Moon

Posted on: 11/22/09 6:50 PM | by Jonathan McKee

Twilight’s sequel The New Moon proved to not only be THE pop culture phenomenon of the year, but the biggest opening weekend of the year, grossing 72.7 million on it’s opening day alone (beating out Dark Knight), and raking in 140 million for the weekend so far (it’s Sunday as I write this).

Todd (our movie review guy), David (our director of content development) and I went to see the movie together on Saturday while attending the YS National Youth Workers Convention in Atlanta (yes… we cut the convention to see a movie!) … and as you can see from this pic… we were not ashamed to boldly represent!

So what did I think?

It’s soooooo hard to approach this film unbiased. Twilight fans are so emotionally invested in the characters of the saga that they are borderline obsessive. Combine that with what we already knew going into the film about the “self-destructive” messages present in the story… it’s hard to know how objective I can be. But here goes!

Bella really needs to get a life!

Wow… it’s really hard to watch this girl. Yes, I know that girls feel emotions. Yes, I know that it’s difficult when someone breaks up with you. But Bella’s emotions are on steroids. The film offers several scenes where we see Bella anguishing over her loss… my wife didn’t make that much noise having my children!

Her self-destructive behavior was probably even more-so than we predicted in our Youth Culture Window article we wrote about the film last week. I’m surprised she didn’t just pull up her sleeves and start cutting away.

Here’s some of her lines I jotted down during the film:

  “You’re my only reason to stay alive.”

  “My pain was my only reminder that he was real.”

  “I’m not a car that you can fix up. I’m never gonna run right.”

When Bella took off with a stranger on the back of a motorcycle (with no helmet), her friend said, “You’re insane! Suicidal!’ Bella simply replied. “That was such a rush.”

Her self-destructive behavior gets worse as the film continues.

At the end Edward wants to commit suicide too. He says, “I couldn’t live in a world where you don’t exist.”

Yes, we saw similar attitudes from Romeo and Juliet. But New Moon preaches it in a language that young girls understand fluently. I encourage you to watch the film and see this for yourself.

Add to that the fact that Bella gets in a love triangle between Jacob and Edward, allowing herself to be so emotionally tied to each, that it’s unfair to both guys. The film doesn’t seem to present any problem with this kind of two-timing behavior. It’s hard to imagine what young people are learning about love and relationships from films like this.

In addition, Bella and Edward discuss the possibility of losing their soul when becoming a vampire. Bella quickly dismisses the reality, finally resolving that it’s a sacrifice she’s willing to take. Again… no big deal… according to the film makers.

Hmmmmmm.

Bottom Line: Bella is a terrible role model. As entertaining as the film was at times… Bella was a turd in the custard.

Parents, I don’t recommend you letting your tweens or teens watch this without you. I’ll be so bold to say, SKIP IT. The film is completely clean and deemed “okay” by many. Don’t let the lack of sex or language fool you. The negative imitatable behavior from this film is at an all time high.

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