Youth Culture Archives - Page 33 of 57 - Jonathan's Blog From The Source

On the Front Lines With Teenagers

Posted on: 08/26/10 9:11 AM | by Jonathan McKee

In my CONNECT workshop, I always teach a section called “Connecting on the Front Lines.” This is where the rubber meets the road– when we step out of our comfort zone to try to meet some kids on their turf… and we have NO IDEA what to say!

Have you ever been there? I have. It’s terrifying!

Michelle has too. She just emailed me this idea she uses when she’s on campus trying to connect with kids.

Hey Jonathan!

I just wanted to share an idea with you. I have been visiting our local middle school every week for the past three years. Something that works really well for me to meet students is to bring snack-size candy bars. I put a few on the table where I sit, and it doesn’t take long for kids to ask, “Hey, can I have a candy bar?” My response is always the same. “Yes, but there’s a catch. You have to tell me your name.” They do, and then I tell them my mine. Okay, so now I’m learning some names (and I do write them down and try to learn them!).

The next week, some of the same kids will approach (plus a few of their friends), and hopefully I remember their names (or at least a few names). So I tell them, “If I remember your name, you have to answer a question for me. If I don’t know your name, the candy is yours.” I bring a “Would You Rather?” book or another discussion starter book along with me. The kids love this! They run up every week yelling, “What’s my name? Ask me a question!”

Eventually, I had a small group of them that just wanted to answer questions, and the principal allowed them to skip the “free rec” time outside to sit with me in the cafeteria and talk.

I thought this might help some of those out there with a fear of going on campus to meet kids. This way is pain-free!

Thanks for a great site!

Michelle, Michigan

I love Michelle’s idea.

It’s tough out there on the front lines. That’s why I wrote CONNECT. Chapters 5 thru 8 talk specifically about going to the front lines to reach the three types of outreach kids on “their turf,” laying out the process step by step. Youth workers- Now is a great time to get this into the hands of your volunteers! (We have this book on sale right now on our site– lowest price on the web. We even have bulk package deals with a greater discount if you want to buy it for your whole team.)

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Katy’s the Top Pick

Posted on: 08/23/10 4:00 PM | by Jonathan McKee

Katy Perry is going to be the top pick in most teenagers’ iPods this week with the Tuesday release of her new “explicit” album Teenage Dream. That’s why we released a Youth Culture Window article yesterday, not only giving you a peek into Katy’s world, but also providing you with a glimpse at the content you can expect from her.

Her album cover should tell parents enough. It’s a full body picture of her, lying naked on a cloud (with the Parental Advisory label on the bottom right). But unfortunately most kids will be downloading it anyway, and sadly… many parents really don’t care.

Her title song, Teenage Dream is already #1 on iTunes right now, and the very racy video is #2. My article goes into more details. Here’s just a snippet:

She’s the daughter of not one, but two, pastors. She says she’s a believer, and often prays…sometimes in tongues! She’s even released a gospel album.

Then why is it that she’s one of the worst role models for young people these days?

A Good Run
When she takes the stage nowadays, it’s as Katy Perry, even though she was born Katheryn Elizabeth Hudson in 1984. Regardless of what you call her, this young lady has had quite a run over the last two years.

On May 6, 2008, her smash hit “I Kissed a Girl” was released and quickly hit #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 (where it stayed for seven weeks). Her follow-up song “Hot N Cold” peaked at #3 on the charts very soon after.

More recently she’s offered the world her version of summertime pop in “California Gurls.” (No I didn’t misspell her title; that’s her way of invoking the Beach Boys without paying royalties.) It sits at #3 on Billboard’s Hot 100 chart.

August 2010 is proving a watershed month for Perry as well. On August 9, she hosted FOX’s annual Teen Choice Awards. Her latest photo op is the August 19 cover of Rolling Stone, where the lead feature article tells of “The Hard Road & Hot Times of a Fallen Angel.” Perry’s latest hit “Teenage Dream” is riding the #9 position on Billboard’s Hot 100 (and, depending on the day you look, usually #2 on iTunes’ song and video charts). Her highly anticipated new album (also titled Teenage Dream) drops this Tuesday, August 24.

Now you see why “it’s good to be Katy Perry.”

But does that make Katy Perry good for our kids?

CLICK HERE FOR THE WHOLE ARTICLE

Keep your eyes on Katy… our kids already do.

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Inside Katy Perry

Posted on: 08/13/10 2:20 AM | by Jonathan McKee

Katy Perry has been in the limelight quite a bit lately, hosting the Teen Choice Awards on Fox on Monday night, on the current cover of Rolling Stone magazine, breaking records with her summer hit California Gurls, and now watching her song Teenage Dream climb the charts (it’s the #3 most downloaded song on iTunes as I write this, and #9 on Billboard’s Hot 100).

I read the Rolling Stone interview over the weekend, called up my buddy David R. Smith (who writes many of our Youth Culture Window articles) and told him, “We’ve got to chime in on this to our readers.”

So David has been working on a nice little piece about Katy Perry… you’ll see it soon.

It’s fascinating. Here’s a girl that was raised in a strict (and dare I say “weird”) religious home…. she wasn’t allowed to say “deviled eggs” they had to call them “angeled eggs,” no TV, no secular music. So… whenever she was away from home at her friends’ house… she says she was glued to MTV.

Hmmmmm.

Rolling Stone portrays her as a “good girl,” actually comparing her to Taylor Swift. But a paragraph later she is spouting off the f-word, joking like she’s going to show her pubic hair to prove her “real hair color,” and making sexual references that sadly, probably wouldn’t make many kids in this culture wince.

The lyrics of her new song speak pretty loudly as well. I already ranted a bit about that in my expose’ about the Teen Choice Awards where she sang Teenage Dream, singing:

We drove to Cali
And got drunk on the beach
Got a motel and
Built a floor out of sheets
I finally found you
My missing puzzle piece
I’m complete

Let’s go all the way tonight
No regrets, just love
We can dance until we die
You and I
We’ll be young forever…

All that to an audience of teens and tweens.

What a “good girl.”

Sad. Katy is really talented and seems like a lot of fun. But she’s learned what sells and she’s not worried about who’s becoming corrupted, or sexualized along the way.

Keep your eyes open for our entire Youth Culture Window article on her in another week.

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Using Kesha to talk about true love

Posted on: 08/11/10 7:28 PM | by Jonathan McKee

I don’t know if you’ve noticed… but we’ve been pumping out a ton of free curriculum and discussions on TheSource4YM’s MUSIC DISCUSSIONS page and MOVIE CLIP DISCUSSIONS page this summer.

This week we just added a new discussion using Kesha’s song, Your Love is My Drug to springboard a conversation about focusing on the true definition of love given by God.

Most of our kids are familiar with Kesha and this song… this is a great chance to ask them, “Have you thought about what she’s saying?”

Our discussion provides small group questions, scripture and a wrap up.

Find that and others on our MUSIC DISCUSSIONS page.

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A Glimpse Into What Teens Watch

Posted on: 08/3/10 5:37 PM | by Jonathan McKee

Three times a year… yes, only three times a year, I tell you to set your DVRs to record an award show watched by teens. One of those is coming next Monday night on Fox: The Teen Choice Awards.

I always tell parents to put their kids to bed and turn on The Teen Choice Awards. This show is always a revealing look into our youth culture, giving adults a peek at many of the teen idols their kids listen to, watch and talk about. It’s healthy for adults to be in “the know” about these things.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not asking you to start listening to Katy Perry every day or watching Jersey Shore. This one glimpse will tell you plenty. Take last year for instance– Miley’s little pole dance, and Britney’s “Ultimate Choice” award. Click here for my entire synopsis of that event.

This year I wouldn’t expect much less with Katy Perry as a host and performing. We all saw what her performance brought at the MTV Video Music Awards.

So set your DVRS to Fox on Monday night.

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The Sexualization of Young Girls

Posted on: 07/28/10 10:37 AM | by Jonathan McKee

I’ve blogged about the subject countless times- the impact that sexualized media has on our kids, particularly our girls. And often I receive comments back, “Can’t we do something about this?”

Yes. Plenty. And most of it starts with what you can do in your own home. But some might also be interested in some national legislation that’s on the table.

The issue is this: today’s youth are bombarded with sexualized media content, and its consequences are unquestionable (Head up… I think today’s blog is going to break a record for the most hyperlinks. I’m going to bombard you with research and articles today). You see it every day in the top 10 songs at any given time, or from artist that know that sex sells, artist like Britney, Christina, and even Miley. Some researchers have actually labeled this phenomena, calling it “sexualization.” The American Psychological Association released a report titled, ‘The Sexualization of Girls,’ defining sexualization as “When a person’s value comes only from her/his sexual appeal or behavior, to the exclusion of other characteristics, and when a person is sexually objectified, e.g., made into a thing for another’s sexual use.” According to their research, the consequences of sexualization are detailed as “negative effects in a variety of domains, including cognitive functioning, physical and mental health, sexuality, and attitudes and beliefs.”

As parents and youth workers, we’ve seen these effects first hand. You have heard me talk about it, and hopefully even read the research firsthand. Even those not in contact with kids read the headlines and can’t avoid the fact that “1 in 4 teenager girls have an STD.”

Think about that for a second- especially those that think, “Oh, this is nothing new.” If you graduated in 1967- 1 in 32 teenagers had an STD. In 1983- 1 in 18 teenagers had an STD.

Today, it’s 1 in 4.

Bottom line: Kids are saturating themselves in sexualized media, they don’t understand the consequences, and they’re paying for it big time. All this while parents watch from the sidelines.

You’ve heard me rant about this numerous times and I always like to provide a “take-away,” something parents and youth workers can do about it (talking with your kids, watching media with your kids, establishing boundaries, etc.) This time I’m going to defer to Dr. Stephanie Smith from the APA website in her article, Raising Healthy Kids in a Sexualized Media World. Stephanie draws our attention to the impact of sexualization and links the national legislation on the table. I love her wrap up (here “take-away”) to parents– “tips for helping children manage what they see and hear and make healthy choices” (I want you to hear it from someone else for a change). Here they are in brief.

Stay Engaged
Check in on the shows your kids are watching; listen to the music they listen to; read the magazines they read.

Talk a Lot but Listen More
Instead of dominating the conversation talking about why you think something is right or wrong, let your kids take the lead. I am continually amazed at the insight and maturity many kids have about these topics – we just need to give them the opportunity to tell us!

Be the Teacher
You are still your child’s first and most important teacher and role model. Even if they don’t seem to be watching or listening to you – DON’T BE FOOLED – they are!

I encourage you to read her thoughts in entirety here.

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What Teens Need

Posted on: 07/21/10 1:53 PM | by Jonathan McKee

A persistent gap exists between what teens need and what adults in this nation actually offer them. Best Buy has put up the money to fund the Search Institute’s study on that gap. The main finding? The call for positive adult influences.

Heard that before?

Many of you probably remember me telling the story (I tell it in my CONNECT book and my CONNECT workshop) about my friend Brandon coming up to me and asking me, “What is the most important thing we can be doing in youth ministry?”

The answer wasn’t great talks or awesome games… it was connecting with teenagers one-on-one. Nothing beats the influence of a positive adult role model loving kids and spending time with them. (And that’s what led me to write that book, CONNECT)

Ypulse.com just got a chance to connect with Tim Showalter-Loch, Senior Manager, Community Relations at Best Buy and Gene Roehlkepartain, Vice President at Search Institute, interviewing them about this second annual Teen Voice report. Just a snippet from Tim:

One of the most important findings in this year’s Teen Voice survey was that too many teens lack positive, sustained and meaningful relationships with adults beyond the family, such as teachers, mentors, grandparents, neighbors and other caring adults. In fact, we found that just 19 percent of 15-year-olds scored high on the index measuring adult-youth relationships, indicating that there is significant room for improvement when it comes to strengthening positive relationships between teens and adults.

Sound familiar?

You can find out more about this Teen Voice 2010 study here.

I just find in interesting that most people doing research about “what teens need” find the same thing: a need for positive adult role models.

Hmmmmmm.

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“Just Let Em’ Watch TV!”

Posted on: 07/19/10 4:31 PM | by Jonathan McKee

It’s amazing how often parents just stand by and watch their kids lose their innocence.

This past weekend on my flight coming back from speaking in Nebraska two elementary-aged kids sat next to me. Their mom sat a couple rows behind and her kids ended up by me– a boy and girl, probably 3rd and 5th grade.

I introduced myself and joked a little about the drawings on the emergency card. They laughed and I asked them questions about flying, “Have you ever flown before?” “Do you like flying?” I wanted them to feel comfortable with me for the flight. After the takeoff, I helped them order their drinks and work the tray tables. They were really polite, sweet little kids.

Soon the little girl pulled down her seat tray, removed a stuffed monkey from her bag and placed him up on the tray, sitting comfortably with his legs crossed and staring back at her with his shiny black little eyes. The boy pulled out a toy dragon and placed it with care on his tray table.

I remember thinking, “How young. How innocent.”

About 30 minutes into the flight, they slid their backpacks from under the seat in front of them and pulled out some magazines. The little boy had a MAD Magazine, the little girl had the newest tween magazine, littered with pictures of Justin Bieber, Miley Cyrus, Robert Pattinson and other teen idols.

It was heartbreaking watching this little girl, probably just 8-years-old, looking in awe at pictures of Miley and Kristen, reading little “did you know” facts about their celeb lifestyles. It was upsetting because I saw the innocence slowly being sucked away. Here’s a sweet little kid who probably just learned how to ride her bike. Her favorite companion is a stuffed monkey. And what does our society want to do with these little girls? Grow them up much too fast!

Here little girl… look at this celeb named Miley. Or this one named Britney. Sorry, we can’t show you pics of Lindsey right now… she’s fresh out of rehab and back in jail.

Which ‘Twilight‘ guy do you like better? Robert or Taylor? Here they are with their shirts off. Aren’t they dreamy? Here’s a rapper singing with Justin Beiber. Oooops, don’t download any of this rapper’s music– it’s explicit.

I felt like covering the monkey’s eyes. I’ll protect you Baboo!

After the kids tired of the magazines, they started playing with their toys. It was adorable. “Hey, let’s say that Baboo rides your dragon!” The kids made their toys fly, wrestle each other (the dragon seemed to always prevail against the monkey), and romp off to an assortment of imaginary worlds.

All of a sudden their mother came up to check on them. “Hey, use the earphones and listen to the music or watch the TV show.”

The kids stared back at their mother like, Do we have to?

Mom dug the headphones out of their seat pocket and showed them how to put them on. “Here, watch this show.”

I looked up to see what United was playing for “family” enjoyment. An episode of Two and a Half Men (I kid you not).
The kids reluctantly put on their headphones and stared up at the screen while their mother returned to her seat. After two minutes the kids grew restless. The boy leaned over to his sister, “Let’s play some more.”

The headphones disappeared, Charlie Sheen’s sex jokes were silenced, and within seconds Baboo and the dragon were back to wrestling once again.

If only we could freeze this moment of innocence.

Unfortunately, in just a blink of an eye, middle school will arrive, the monkey and the dragon will probably be shelved, and the iPods of these two cherubs will be full of that day’s Katy Perry, Christina Aguillera and Miley Cyrus. Mom won’t have to encourage TV watching anymore; TV will trump building forts, riding bikes and playing with toys. ABC and MTV will become their teachers, innocence will be totally lost… all under the watch of well-meaning parents.

But if the watchman sees the sword coming and does not blow the trumpet to warn the people and the sword comes and takes the life of one of them, that man will be taken away because of his sin, but I will hold the watchman accountable for his blood.’ (Ezekiel 33:6)

But if anyone causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a large millstone hung around his neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea. (Matthew 18:6)

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You Might Be a Narcissist If…

Posted on: 07/11/10 9:59 PM | by Jonathan McKee

This week a guest author wrote our Youth Culture Window article. She’s a friend of mine who is a counselor- her name is Lisa Charlebois. Lisa co-wrote an interesting book titled, “You Might Be a Narcissist If…” The book helps you identify Narcissism in ourselves and others. Fascinating stuff.

I have 10 copies of the book I’ll give away. See below. But first check out a glimpse of her article:

Narcissist—[one who displays an] inordinate fascination with oneself; excessive self-love; vanity.

Kate is becoming more and more concerned about her son, Chris, a high school freshman.

Since 2nd grade Chris has been friends with Zack. Kate has always liked Zack, but some things are beginning to bother her.

She observes Chris giving in constantly to what Zack wants to do and agreeing with Zack on most issues, as well as with what Zack deems as important. She’s starting to wonder if Chris has developed a habit of denying his real feelings and opinions when Zack is around. She also notices Zack frequently belittling Chris in ways that disturb her.

Kate knows she’s had to get used to the fact that bonding is different for boys than girls, and that boys often find it hysterical to call each other names. Still she’s uneasy. In the past she figured Zack was good for Chris because he was more outgoing than her son; she even admired that Zack was viewed as popular—yet chose to spend much of his time with Chris over the years.

Now Kate’s beginning to wonder if that was such a good thing…

CLICK HERE FOR THE REST OF THIS ARTICLE

I’ll make it simple. The first 10 people to read the full article and comment to this blog… I’ll send you a free copy of her book. (Don’t leave your address in the comment– just your email. I’ll email you for your address if you’re the first 10.)

Enjoy!

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Video Game Content

Posted on: 07/10/10 3:52 PM | by Jonathan McKee

Last week, after speaking about youth culture at my home church, a parent came up and asked me about today’s popular video games. He said something I’ve heard hundreds of times. “My son loves video games and I just don’t know which ones are okay and which ones aren’t!”

I’m right there with ya! My son Alec loves video games and we’ve had numerous discussions about video games- which are appropriate and which aren’t.

My quick two cents: Read & Rent!

First… Read about the games. This past week our Youth Culture Window page actually featured an article titled, MOVE OVER MARIO that provided some great insight about today’s popular games and how to help our kids make discerning media decisions. You’ll find some great advice and links in that article. You’ll also find that we’ve written about games in past articles- articles about “screens” in general and even specific games. Always take the time to do a little investigating when little Johnny asks you if he can go to Billy’s house and play a game he says is clean… a game called Grand Theft Auto. 🙂

NEW NOTE: As Adam pointed out in the comments below– my friend Al Menconi has a great website that includes many video game reviews… a great resource for parents: www.AlMenconi.com

Then, if what you read about the game seems okay, then Rent it before buying it. Most Blockbuster Video stores rent all the current games for the major game consoles. And it’s better for you or your kid to spend less than $10 on a game than $60 only to find out, you wouldn’t have allowed the game in the first place.

That’s my two cents!

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