Fear of the Crosswalk Lady

Posted on: 04/4/08 5:11 PM | by Jonathan McKee

What’s your biggest fear? Shark attack? Hurricane? Spiders?

If you asked me that question I wouldn’t even hesitate to answer: I’m scared of the crosswalk lady at my daughter’s school!

That’s right, the crosswalk lady. To the innocent passerby she might seem nice and sweet. But really she’s just waiting to pounce on someone and inflict her justice! She’s a mall security guard gone bad!

My daughter’s school has numerous volunteers that help guide traffic in and out of the parking lot, stopping traffic as needed for the children to cross the crosswalk onto the school campus. Some of the volunteers are nice soccer moms. Some are men. But one of them is a woman with an agenda. She’s gonna clean up this school by kicking butt and taking names!

The school has a routine in place of how parents should drop off their kids. It’s a little tricky for new parents, but once you get it down it’s easy. This school is a special school that brings kids from all over town. There are no busses, so the “car” traffic is pretty busy on any given morning. No worries. All a parent needs to do is wait in the line of cars, pull in the long circular driveway, stop when traffic stops, and drop off your child.

Where’s the problem?

That’s what I’m still wondering.

Here’s what seems to be the problem:

  I didn’t pull up far enough.
  I pulled up too far.
  I didn’t stop soon enough.
  I stopped too soon!
  I dropped her off to early… no…. I dropped her off too late!

Aaaaauuugh! I feel as if I’m being followed by a police car in a 55 zone and he’ll pull me over for speeding at 56, but he’ll cite me for obstructing traffic at 54. “Please little foot… be strong and sure! Maintain that 55!”

My wife Lori and I “rock-paper-scissors” who gets to drop off Ashley each morning. We don’t mind dropping off Alec. Heck, I’ll carry Alyssa on my BACK to her school! Just DON’T make me have to go and face that NAZI at Ashley’s school.

So if you ever see me in the corner of my office, crouched in fetal position, sucking my thumb and mumbling, “Mama… mama…” you’ll know that I just dropped off Ashley.

Oh how I loathe that crosswalk lady!

South Dakota

Posted on: 03/29/08 3:48 AM | by Jonathan McKee

It’s 3:40 AM Saturday (yeah, trust me, I’m TIRED!) and I’m getting ready to head out to the airport to hop on the first flight out to Denver, then on to South Dakota. I will land in Sioux Falls and then drive into Huron where I’ll be speaking at an event tonight, then teaching a parenting workshop on Sunday afternoon (then flying home Sunday night).

This is an exciting trip. When I speak on Saturday night I’ll be speaking to parents and kids. It’s a big event that will be bringing out a huge portion of the small community as well as people from surrounding communities. It’s a church audience and my challenge will be to reach out beyond the church walls.

Sunday is a parent workshop. I’ll be talking to about 125 to 150 parents about today’s youth culture and raising our kids right before rebellion. I love this kind of training workshop… I’m looking forward to it.

Huron, SD is one of the coldest places I have been! Last time I traveled there it was about 7 degrees and the people there were excited how warm it was! I learned to appreciate heated seats (before then, I always wondered about the need of that. Now I don’t ask.) I checked weather.com and it’s supposed to be 42 in SD today. (Whew!) That’s still a tad colder than my chilly Sacramento 62 degrees today.

Well… off I go. If you think of it, please pray for my speaking and my travel.

Thanks so much for your prayers

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Married Men Will Want to Read This!

Posted on: 03/6/08 9:58 AM | by Jonathan McKee

I guess you could file this one under the “duh” factor… but it’s nice to see it in print.

So, to all you married guys out there, here’s a “post-Valentines” Associated Press headline for you that you’ll want to pay attention to: Men Who Do Housework May Get More Sex.

Yahoo News reports:

American men still don’t pull their weight when it comes to housework and child care, but collectively they’re not the slackers they used to be. The average dad has gradually been getting better about picking himself up off the sofa and pitching in, according to a new report in which a psychologist suggests the payoff for doing more chores could be more sex.

Hmmmmm.

Well… I’d love to keep writing… but I gotta go vaccuum!

 

Lori “Owns” Surfing Leaving Jonathan in Her Wake

Posted on: 03/5/08 11:48 AM | by Jonathan McKee

Yesterday I shared with you that my wife Lori and I were going surfing (we’re on vacation celebrating 17 years of marriage- HEY, NO OLD JOKES!!!) We did, and Lori “owned” (to use my kids’ words for “showing me up!”).

Neither of us have surfed before. So we showed up for a lesson and were each handed a huge “barge” of a surfboard that a Rhino could get up on. The slogan of this “surf school” is “For beginners and cowards!”

Now you have to realize that it was a HUGE ordeal for me to get Lori to even get out on the ocean on a board. She is scared to death of sharks and was sure that she would be shark meat regardless of any statistics you throw at her. But she made the mistake of mentioning to me how fun surfing would be and I jumped on it before she had a chance to change her mind.

So here we are yesterday at the “surf shop” getting ready. The day started out hilarious as they handed us these “rash guard” covers for our upper body (long sleeve shirts) so we wouldn’t get all scraped up. Then they told Lori that she should wear some long shorts to protect her from scraping up her legs. So they dress her up like a clown and I can’t stop laughing. Here’s my cute little wife who was wearing this cute little swim suit… and now she looks like something between a clown and a colorblind tourist in blue floral print (not that my red outfit was much better).

My laughing was short lived. It was time to surf.

After a quick “land lesson,” our instructor Ikeka took us out on the water. Lori rides the first wave all the way in and I fall flat on my butt. A photographer was there to document the whole thing. Look! Lori stays up even when I wipe out next to her, knocking my board into hers.

It takes me about four times before I really got the hang of it. Meanwhile, all the instructors are gawking at Lori because (despite her clownsuit), she’s trying all these cool things that the instructer is telling her like switching to fakey (jumping off the board and switching the other direction mid-wave). And then… I kid you not… she does another trick… she puts her feet together, faces backwards and rides it backwards!!!

She showed me up big time.

But we had a blast and got to ride a few in together.

Yes, the biggest wave we experienced was about 4 feet. Yes, our boards were barges. Real surfers would have laughed at us. But we had a blast. And Lori’s a lot more sore than me this morning! Ha!

If you’re married and haven’t done something like this together… I recommend it.

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A Dab of News to Know

Posted on: 03/4/08 10:34 AM | by Jonathan McKee

Surfing, Kid Rock arrested, American Idol contestant a stripper, new iPod technology, Moses and the Israelites stoned??? What do these have to do with each other?

Blogs are short and sparse of late… I’m on vacation with my wife Lori celebrating 17 years of marriage (Wow, I sound old!). We’re having a blast in a tropical getaway, our first time really away for a week in a spot like this (it seems like so many of our vacations are attached to a speaking trip to save money, travel, etc. This vacation is truly 100% VACATION. Wow!) My parents are taking care of our three kiddos (learning what it’s like to taxi three kids to different activities… they’ll sleep well when we’re back), so very cool of them.

I am very excited about today. This morning I talked Lori into going surfing. No, we don’t surf. But we’re going this morning. It’s amazing because all my wife talks about is sharks and somehow I still convinced her to go. I’ll report back about that. The vacation is a nice break. 

Anyway… back to blogging- some quick random news for you to know. (I always like to keep you updated with the stuff your kids might be talking about… or stuff that’s just interesting to me. Hey… it’s my blog!)

In the media, all the talk is about American Idol contestant David Hernandez who used to strip for a living a Phoenix… at a male strip club. CNN reports:

The 24-year-old finalist from Glendale, Arizona, once worked as a stripper at Dick’s Cabaret, appearing fully nude and performing lap dances for the club’s “mostly male” clientele, club manager Gordy Bryan said Monday.

“He had the look and the type that people like, so he made pretty good money here,” Bryan said.

It’s not clear whether a history as a stripper could disqualify Hernandez from the competition. In 2003, finalist Frenchie Davis was dismissed because of her appearance on an adult Web site; but last year, Antonella Barba remained in the competition after racy photos of her surfaced on the Internet.

(updated)TV Guide spoke with Idol’s executive producer about the situation in this interview. Here’s a snippet:

TVGuide.com: Will the revelations about David’s stripper past have any impact on whether he stays on the show?

Ken Warwick: No, it won’t make any difference. The truth is, we’re never judgmental about what people do to earn a living. They’ve got to put food in people’s mouths. We’ve had strippers on the show before. Nikki McKibbon was one in [Season] 1. We’re never judgmental about people who do things like that. If it were some sort of heavy porn, then maybe we’d have to take action. But certainly not on this.

TVGuide.com: Were you aware of his past before it was reported?

Warwick: No, I wasn’t. [Laughs] But the truth of the matter is, it wouldn’t have made any difference. There are a lot of people I know who’d love to have the opportunity just to make a better living by taking their clothes off.

Sigh.

And another celeb in trouble. Outspoken musician Kid Rock got himself arrested for punching, kicking and hitting a victom with a chair in a Waffle House. Do I need to even say anything further about this?

The techno side of me just collided with my interest in working out in this news piece. Nike and Apple are working together to make the iPod compatable with gym equipment. I’ve been keeping my eyes open for anything iPod of late with the launch of our new podcast for teenagers. But this side article caught my attention:

The companies announced Tuesday that they are working with gym equipment manufacturers and health clubs to allow members to plug their iPod Nano into cardio equipment to track workouts, set goals and upload the information to a Nike Web site.

And in ludicrous news, I sure hope no one believes this:

The biblical Israelites may have been high on a hallucinogenic plant when Moses brought the Ten Commandments down from Mount Sinai, according to a new study by an Israeli psychology professor.

Hmmmmmmm…

The Source “East Coast/West Coast” Thing

Posted on: 02/22/08 4:01 AM | by Jonathan McKee

Yesterday was a fun day for us here at THE SOURCE as David, our East Coast guy, flew West and connected with me before I flew East.

David R. Smith has been one of our speakers and writers for years, but in the fall of 2007 we were able to hire him enough hours where he can now speak, train and write full time. David lives in Tampa… our East Coast rep of sorts. I’m in Sacramento doing the West Coast thang. Funny though… I’m flying to Pennsylvania this weekend for a camp I am speaking at, and David is teaching one of our workshops in California this weekend. I had him come out a day early so we could do a few podcasts (note our cool podcast picture) and hang out. It’s not often we get to hang out together.

So yesterday I picked him up from the airport around noonish, we got some BAR B Q, and then came back to my home office, worked on his seminar a bit, and record two podcasts. One of the podcasts we recorded was our next episode of our new podcast for teenagers, A Li’l Bit. We’re really excited about this podcast. It’s a weekly podcast we just launched for teenagers to get them in the WORD each week. This is simply because we’ve noticed that more teenagers carry iPods than they do Bibles. We figure that maybe we can get the WORD in their heads through earphones if not through reading it.

After working we at dinner and watched American Idol with my Family (Where I picked 4 out of the 4 that got dropped… YEAH!) David was on East Coast time so he sacked early. I’m leaving on a 6:15 flight this morning, so I’m up at o’ dark thirty. Pray for our speaking and training this weekend if you think of it.

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Males… Don’t Believe Her for the Next Three Days

Posted on: 02/11/08 12:23 PM | by Jonathan McKee

Guys… don’t buy the lie! Don’t you DARE listen when your special girl says any of the following statements in the next few days:

  “Don’t get me anything.” 

  “We don’t need to celebrate Valentine’s Day this year.”

  “I don’t need anything from you… just your love!”

Lies! Don’t believe her! Falsities. Not a shred of truth. Liar, liar, pants on fire!

I’m speaking from experience guys, and thousands of other males have made that fatal mistake… ONCE! (because if we’ve made the mistake once, we’ve never done it again!) I listened to my wife when she said that one year. Valentine’s Day came and went and I took her advice. I didn’t get her a thing. Oh boy was that bad advice!

If she says one of the above statements… she doesn’t mean it. She might think she means it, but she DOES NOT! What she really means is something much deeper and mysterious locked in the deep emotions of the female body. If you could read her mind at the moment, you’d read something like this:

“I don’t need a gift…. but I want one. But that’s selfish of me to want one… isn’t it? So I should let you off the hook… but I really wouldn’t be disappointed if you gave me something. I’d probably actually be really disappointed if you don’t give me anything… but I shouldn’t be that way… so don’t get me something… or do… either way, but if you don’t… I can’t help but wonder if you really like me…”  (This line of thinking goes on way too long to type!)

Bottom line: GIVE THEM SOMETHING! How hard is it? But you might be saying, “Jonathan… I’m poor! I’m a youth worker. The janitor brings home more than me!” If that’s the case, you don’t need to stop by the jewelry store. Heck, just do something! If she likes chocolate, just get her a little chocolate sum-something that says, “I went out of the way to get this for you because I love you.” If she loves flowers, get her flowers. And anything from a gas station doesn’t count! (Costco does count, but you have to go buy a vase somewhere else.)

And, if she told you she doesn’t need anything, she DEFINATELY didn’t mean don’t get her a card. They ALWAYS want a card. So if you’re too pathetic to go and buy a gift, you MUST go at least buy a card. And don’t just sign it. Oh no… you might as well not even buy the card then. You have to write a little note that says something about the card to show that you read the card and chose it just for her, and then add your own commentary on your feelings about what the card was talking about.

Wow… it’s tiring thinking about this. I think I need to go take a nap!

And when she reads this blog and tells you, “He doesn’t know what he’s talking about!” What she’s really saying is, “I’m really mad that we’ve been portrayed as such emotional and selfish creatures! But… I still hope you get me something… if not I won’t get mad… but… it would be nice…” (again… this thinking goes on for a very long time.)

A final plea to all the males. If you’re still thinking, “Not my Sally-Jean (I’m guessing this would cover all the males in Texas and Oklahoma), she’s not like that!” Then you have to ask yourself one thing. “WHAT HAVE YOU GOT TO LOSE IF YOU JUST BUY HER SOMETHING!”

I promise you. She WON’T get mad if you buy her something anyway. She won’t get mad if you make her breakfast in bed WITH a little card from you. She won’t be upset if expensive flowers arrive at work. She won’t be agitated if she wakes up to find a new outfit from her favorite store hung in the closet. She won’t be angry if you surprise her and take her to dinner at her favorite restaurant. (make reservations now!)

Very little to lose… a lot to gain! Better go shopping!

 

Squeaking Through to Wisconsin

Posted on: 02/1/08 5:03 PM | by Jonathan McKee

Today I flew out of Sacramento on a direct flight to Chicago where I popped in my rental car to drive 2 hours to one of my favorite camps to speak at, Timber-lee Christian Camp.

I gotta admit, last night I had my doubts if I’d ever get here- the weather was looking pretty bad. My dad was flying back from Kansas City where he did a workshop and he said everything was stopped at Ohare (Chicago’s Airport.. my destination this morning). Sure enough, flights were being canceled or delayed up to five hours due to heavy snow in the midwest.

So this morning I checked flight status and surprisingly everything was fine (when I was leaving my house at 4 AM). But 5 minutes before we were supposed to board we received word of a delay (figures). Chicago had a foot of snow last night and they were limiting incoming flights. I popped open my laptop and began getting some work done. They actually didn’t delay long. Bottom line… we only arrived in Chicago an hour late. (Whew! There are a lot of people stuck in airports across the country right now. I squeaked through!)

I was in my rental car (a 4×4) navigating through the newly fallen snow by 1:30 PM and stopping at my favorite pizza place in the world, Giordano’s, at 2:30. (I wrote about Giordannos in an earlier blog.. wow… that’s some great pizza! This is my only time scheduled to pass through Chicago in the next six months… I had to get my fix!)

I arrived at the camp around dinner time and got settled in. I am excited about the weekend. I speak once tonight, twice Saturday, and once Sunday. I’m doing a new series on our two natures. Tonight I talk about the world’s focus on “external,” and God’s focus on “internal.” Tomorrow I’ll dive into our two natures (Romans 8) and reveal how we need to give it up to God and let Him work in us instead of us trying to “do works.” It should be a fun time.

I’d love your prayers as I speak to this group of high school kids this weekend. You can also pray for a mighty tail wind on the way home so I can catch the last 5 minutes of the SUPER BOWL!!!!    🙂

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Friday Night Lights On My Mind

Posted on: 01/22/08 8:01 AM | by Jonathan McKee

“I always find it intriguing to catch even a glimpse of how the world views Christians.”

That’s how I started an October 17th EZINE article about NBC’s Friday Night Lights … and so the saga continues.

In review… I loved the show last year. But this year it has seemed to try a little too hard to shock us with murder, backstabbing, and scandal of all shapes and sizes. If anything, the show has lost its realistic feel that it had in Season One.

But one thing has perked my interest- not necessarily in a good way- more like, “Oh no… where are they going with this?!” …that is in the character of Lyla Garrity who accepted Jesus. Since my October article, we have now seen Lyla do some actions that made me cringe, and others that were pretty realistic. A few episodes ago she brought another character (Riggins) to church- a guy that was the last guy you’d expect in church- and we saw something happen to him. It wasn’t vivid, but it was almost as if seeds were planted. Not at all what you’d expect from a TV show!

In the last episode Lyla started working for a Christian radio station hosting a show where Christian young people call in for advice. I looked at my wife Lori when each call came in and said, “Let’s see how they write this Christian answer to a tough question.” Lyla answered “is oral sex okay” (they kind of side-stepped that one), and “should I worry when people make fun of me for praying at school,” etc.

I’m torn. It’s one of the few times I’ve seen a network show have a Christian character that they didn’t seem to mock (Studio 60 might have claimed to do that last year, but… don’t get me started on that one.) Lyla actually is given a good amount of screen time. And even though I don’t agree with everything she’s doing… they seem to be putting her in a positive light.

Well… like it or not, FNL’s attempts to woo audiences haven’t worked.

This New York Times article said yesterday:

All the while, the show is a bona fide washout. Six or so million people watch “Friday Night Lights,” compared with around 13 million for NBC’s hit “Heroes.” No single episode has ever broken the Top 50 most-viewed prime-time shows. In popularity, it lags far behind “Dancing With the Stars,” “Deal or No Deal” and “The Bachelor.” Even now that the Nielsen ratings try to account for viewers who digitally record a show and watch it within a week of its air date (affluent viewers, perhaps?), the show’s numbers are lousy.

So FNL fans should probably prepare themselves… it ain’t gonna last. In the meantime, I’m keeping my eye on the show. I enjoy seeing my favorite characters from last season (Coach, Riggins, and Smash’s mom), and I’m biting my nails as I watch what becomes of the lone Christian Lyla Garrity.

 

Googling Your Name

Posted on: 01/11/08 8:42 PM | by Jonathan McKee

Have you ever googled your own name?

I was searching for one of my new books (to see how GROUP was marketing it) and I ended up googling my name. When I did, I stumbled across an old interview I did that I couldn’t even remember. It was pretty funny reading my answers. Is it bad to laugh at your own jokes from two years prior?  (yeah, probably so)

It’s pretty short- here’s what I said:

It is a very refreshing pleasure to welcome Jonathan McKee to our studio today. I always look forward to reading Jonathan’s powerful, youth focused, eZine which is published by his outstanding organization, The Source for Youth Ministry.

What is the name of your company and what products or services does it provide?
We are www.TheSourceforYouthMinistry.com

We love impacting the lives of kids around the world. And one of the best ways we found to do that is by equipping youth workers who are working with these kids. So our ministry’s goal is threefold: Speaking to kids, Training student and adult leaders, and Providing Free Resources on our web site.

What role do you play in your organization?
I am the president, founder, janitor and best boy.

As a successful person, how did you get started?
I started on the front lines as a youth worker. I was a volunteer in the church, then I worked with Youth for Christ reaching “unchurched” kids for almost 10 years. When I looked on the web for some free resources, I found few . . . almost none. I thought, “What a shame. I have a whole file cabinet full of curriculum and ideas that I’ve developed over the years. Why don’t people share these things?” So I did. And the web site was a hit. So we started doing it full time.

How did you learn what it takes to succeed?
By God’s grace. Actually, I’ve learned about 100 ways how NOT to succeed over the last decade. But slowly, I’m learning a few things that work in youth ministry. And I’m trying to share those ideas with as many people as possible.

What personal/family activities do you enjoy?
I love just hanging out with my family . . . my wife Lori, and my three kids, Alec, Alyssa and Ashley. They’re awesome. We like family bike rides, back pack trips . . . or just piling on the coach with popcorn and a movie.

What experiences in your life have helped you expand who you are as a person?
Eating Pizza! Pizza has made me the man I am!

But I guess I’d also say working with kids on campus. Kids across the globe are hurting and looking for someone to notice them. As I spent years on campus meeting kids and investing time into their lives . . . my life was changed. God used me to share his love with kids. And there’s no greater joy than being used by God to make a difference.

What are your concerns about the world today?
MTV. Have you seen that crap?

Are there any tips or advice you would like to offer people?
Yeah . . . don’t swing your 5 year old around in circles after she just finished eating a spaghetti dinner.

And don’t ever stop learning. The successful people I know are teachable. When I meet a guy who “knows all the answers” . . . I meet someone who’s reached their limit. Go into every situation trying to learn something. Everyone has something to offer. (yes, some less than others)

Which people have been role models to you?
Ray Johnston, Jim Burns, Chap Clark . . . and Napoleon Dynamite.

What are your favorite books, computer programs, or forms of entertainment?
My top 10 favorite books are listed on my web site on the left hand side bar: www.TheSource4YM.com. My least favorite computer program is Microsoft Word because it can spell and format better than me. My favorite entertainment has to be movies. I’m sort of a movie fanatic. But everyone knows that from my movie review page: www.thesource4ym.com/moviereviews

What is it that you are most passionate about or gives you the greatest enjoyment in life?
My 7 year old came home from church the other day and told me how she really wants to trust God with her actions. I asked her if that meant that she would stop talking about how the cat’s butt rises when you pet it. She agreed.

The greatest joy in my life is when I see my own kids following Christ. I love it when I see “a light go on” during a family devotions time or when I see my son put $5 out of his pocket to give to a homeless person on the street. It doesn’t get much better than that.

I was right. It doesn’t get better than that.

Fun little glimpse into the past.