What Ever Happened to Shrewd and Innocent?

Posted on: 12/19/13 12:46 PM | by Jonathan McKee

phil-robertson-suspendedI am sending you out like sheep among wolves. Therefore be as shrewd as snakes and as innocent as doves.” -Matthew 10:16

This week Phil Robertson was suspended “indefinitely” after “disparaging gays as sinners” in his GQ interview.

Yes, it’s true. America has definitely evolved into a country where anyone who speaks their mind against homosexual behavior will be blacklisted. Just ask Victoria Jackson, or Blake Shelton… or Chick filA.

But let’s not be daft. We know better than this.

No, I’m not talking about changing our theology (I have clearly shared my own two cents on the gay issue), I’m talking about changing our methodology Continue reading “What Ever Happened to Shrewd and Innocent?”

R.I.P. baby sister

Posted on: 11/18/13 3:01 AM | by Jonathan McKee

type“I just love being straight up ignored when ever I need you.”

It was the last thing she posted on her Facebook page. Then she went to her high school the next day and hung herself in the school bathroom.

That was last Friday.

Saturday, the day after this tragic suicide, I spoke at an event in the town where this occurred. Many of the youth workers knew kids from the school; they showed me this young lady’s Facebook page.

Some of the posts contained ‘text speak’ like “lawl sike” (basically saying, “just kidding”). But was she kidding? Continue reading “R.I.P. baby sister”

FCC Considers More Sex and Nudity

Posted on: 05/28/13 3:01 AM | by Jonathan McKee

The rumor is true, the FCC is considering allowing more sex and nudity on televisions. Their website posted a public notice last month proposing an end to “the prohibition of expletives and certain images of nudity on television.” Then clean shows like CBS’s Two and a Half Men could finally let loose and tell racy jokes… uh… oh wait…

Sure, network TV is already pretty racy, and blurred/pixilated nudity is increasing logarithmically, but if you want to know where this FCC consideration is heading, just watch a single episode of HBO’s Girls or Game of Thrones (Actually… don’t. But read how some parents are responding when they are exposed to the “soft core porn” of these popular new shows).

People are reacting to this FCC news in two ways Continue reading “FCC Considers More Sex and Nudity”

Don’t Believe the Hype

Posted on: 04/11/12 7:05 PM | by Jonathan McKee

Last week I read an article link that claimed, “Facebook is Responsible for 1/3 of All Divorces.”

Really? Would you actually repeat that statistic? Are you willing to bet your reputation that it’s true? Should we believe the headlines when we read this kind of stuff… or should we possibly take 60 seconds to dig a little deeper?

Last week I implored parents in my parent workshop, “Don’t just read the headlines!” As a guy who spends about 5 to 10 hours a week researching youth culture, let me assure you, headlines can be sooooooo misleading. Take this Facebook article, for example. Last week I saw several different headlines, blog posts and web links all linking to this article, which claimed, an I quote, “Studies have found that Facebook can actually be serious trouble for a relationship and is responsible for one-third of divorces. One-third!”

This provides a perfect example of what to look out for in media hype:

  1. Steer clear of those who don’t cite their research. I’m not being an alarmist when I say, “Never believe a statistic that someone doesn’t cite.” Seriously. If a “study shows that…” then they should document that study. That way you, the reader, can see if Nielson truly analyzed 65,000 phone bills, or if a guy named Jimmy asked 4 teenagers in his garage, “How many of yous guys text each other? Hmmmmm…two hands. I guess that means that a recent survey shows that only 50% of young people text each other!”
  2. Watch out for articles that misread and misquote studies. I know… I know. This one is a little more difficult. This sometimes takes clicking a source and skimming it for a minute or two. Misreading and misquoting stats is common. I’ve written about that in great detail in this 2009 Youth Culture Window article, and again in this 2011 article down under the subtitle “Misinformation.” Or simply take a peek at that Facebook article linked above. That article was not only based on numbers from a website called Divorce Online (hmmmm… red flags anyone?), it actually misread Divorce Online’s original claims. Blogger Tom Royal breaks that down here. But that brings up another subject…
  3. Watch out for online surveys about how many people are doing “online” activities. Yeah. Duh! I once read a statistic about how much time the average teenager spends on the Internet each day. I was familiar with recent numbers from Kaiser and Nielsen, but this particular survey in question revealed waaaaaay higher numbers. About a minute of scrolling and reading quickly revealed that this was based on a survey of a few hundred kids that responded to an online poll on a teen website. Just think about that one. (Let me go down to the corner bar and take a quick survey of how many people in America drink!)

So what can you do as a reader to make sure you are reading and researching responsibly?

Simple. Make sure you make a habit of getting your data from trustworthy sources. Sorry, that excludes all forwarded emails from your Aunt Judy. If any of the articles or studies you read violate the three blunders above…consider reading from a different source.

I can assure you that I’ve probably mistyped, misread or even forgot a citation. I’m human, and I am often pounding out over 5 articles per week. But I can also assure you that those mistakes are the exception. We always strive for accuracy and transparency.That’s why I provide you with a box on the front page of TheSource4Parents.com titled, “Offsite articles Jonathan has read this week” so you can read the exact same articles and studies I’m reading.

If you trust us enough to CONNECT WITH US and subscribe to my blog, our free Youth Culture Window articles or other free newsletters, we are going to make the greatest efforts to always deliver you accurate research with our sources cited and checked. You deserve to know the truth!

What Does the CDC Report Actually Say?

Posted on: 10/20/11 3:29 PM | by Jonathan McKee

I’m just going to think out loud here a little bit about this Youth Culture Window article I’m working on for next week. The topic? This new Center for Disease Control (CDC) National Survey of Family Growth report that claims… uh… what does it claim?

If you’ve picked up the paper in the last week or read any youth ministry or parenting blog, then you’d probably tell me, “Oh, it claims that sexual activity is down and contraception is up.”

That’s what the headlines say. But what does the actual report say?

I know… who has time to read the actual report? Right? Can’t we just trust The Washington Times and everyone else who is chiming in about this?

I’ve talked with you before in detail about being careful to avoid misinformation, instead, reading the actual numbers. Let me give you a sneak peak at what this brand new CDC report actually summarizes: (and I quote)

“Levels of sexual experience and contraceptive use have not changed significantly from 2002.”

I’m going to give you a homework assignment. (I’m sure you’ll do it.) I want you to look at two reports in the next four days before my Youth Culture Window article comes out. Don’t read any headlines, or blogs… but read this actual data:

1. The CDC does a national Youth Risk Behavior survey every two years tracking risk behaviors that teenagers engage in. Take a moment and look at this two page summary from the CDC that shows how those behaviors have changed from 1991 to 2009. Fascinating stuff (and a lot of good news).

2. Now take a look at the new new CDC National Survey of Family Growth (NSFG) report that just came out and read their conclusions/summary. And if you really want to see something interesting, read the section in the “Introduction” about where they collected the pre-2002 data for males. Intriguing stuff.

If you do read that… then look at this chart on that NSFG report:

Just look at that chart for a second and let me ask you: Do any two columns stick out as akwardly/drastically different than the rest of the chart?  Now let me ask you. Would you find it peculiar, or is it just a coincidence, that the male 1988 and 1995 columns (the only two outrageously different columns) were the only two columns collected by a totally different survey, asking different kids?

Hmmmmmm.

Don’t worry. I’m not a conspiracy theorist. I think that sexual activity is down… but two important facts:

1. I don’t think it’s new news.

2. I’m a little skeptical of the 1988 and 1995 male columns above.

Next week in the article I’ll share how both the CDC and myself don’t note any change with statistical significance since 2002. Better yet, I’m going to provide you with what myself and others (Melissa Nesdahl who speaks and writes with Pam Stenzel, and the National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy ) theorize about:

1. Why the decline in teen sexual activity? (Because that is good news worth repeating)

2. How can we continue to help teens succeed?

More on this next week on our Youth Culture Window page.

Focused on the Important This Christmas

Posted on: 12/23/10 1:44 PM | by Jonathan McKee

Last week one of our “The Source for Youth Ministry” board members, John, and his wife Heather were hit by a drunk driver on the way home from a church dinner.

By God’s grace, both of them walked away from the accident… with a huge change of perspective!

Americans sometimes are distracted by materialism, especially during the holiday season. Events like this tend to wake us up to what’s really important in life. Here’s the email my friend John sent out the night of the accident- some great words of wisdom:  (emphasis mine)

Last night on the way home from the (church) dinner Heather and were hit by a drunk driver. We were traveling west on Douglas Blvd towards home in my GMC Denali when I noticed in the rearview mirror a car approaching from behind very fast. I had just enough time to shout out to Heather that we were going to get hit right before the impact. The rear end impact was pretty violent and it put us into a spin pushing us over the curb and into the landscape/sidewalk. As we were spinning we struck a tree on the right front, deploying the air bags. Miraculously, we threaded and bounced through 5 other trees narrowly missing any broadside impacts, coming to rest backwards against the residential block sound wall. The truck is totaled but we were spared, praise God! 

The CHP officer and a witness both estimated the speed of the car that hit us to be 90-100 MPH. The only skid marks at the accident were from our truck so we received the full impact of his speed. After impact, he bounced off us and went into the center median and struck a pine tree across the road. He stumbled across the street after the accident totally oblivious to us, I’m not sure if he knew he hit us. CHP confirmed he was very drunk, he was taken to the hospital and then most likely to jail. We were well taken care of.   The first fireman on the scene was an old friend from (our church), our insurance agent and good friend Jeff came to the site with a jacket for Heather, we were on the phone with our pastor Ray within a few minutes of the accident and our Men’s pastor Greg came to check on us and give us a ride home!
 
We are both doing well today other than having soreness in our necks from the whiplash. Obviously we are very thankful for God’s provision of safety, I guess He decided that our work here isn’t finished. This is the first time I’ve been involved in an accident of this nature and it’s interesting to me how these things can be confusing and clarifying at the same time. Confusing in that we will always wonder why things like this happen, and there will be ramifications from this that we’ll have to deal with that don’t make sense. But more importantly, these types of experiences provide clarity about what is really important in life and who is in control. Our immediate reaction after the accident wasn’t to check the car for damage, but rather to get out of the car and hug each other, tears of joy and thankfulness to our God for sparing us from injury. Our minds jumped right to the “what if” scenarios. What if we had hit that tree? What if the kids had been in the car? What if we’d been in a smaller car? In the initial moments, and upon reflection today, we are reminded of how fragile life is and how quickly circumstances in life can change. Because of this experience, today my thoughts have been focused on the love of my God, my wife, my family and my friends. Is there anything more important? My prayer is that I won’t lose this perspective and that my life won’t be the same. I’m grateful to God for this gentle reminder of HIs love, and the love we share through the common bond of our Savior Jesus Christ.
I hear John loud and clear. Earlier this year I received a phone call from my wife that she and my daughter Ashley had just been in an accident (I tell that story here). These moments remind us of the important things in life: our relationship with God and our relationship with others.
I pray that you all experience some great time with family and with God your Father this Christmas season.
Merry Christmas!

Posted in Faith, News, Prayer |  | Leave A Comment

Spontaneous “Hallelujah” at Macy’s

Posted on: 11/9/10 10:16 PM | by Jonathan McKee

A flash mob hit Macy’s in Philadelphia on Saturday– with more than 650 vocalist- thanks to help from the Opera Company of Philadelphia- who, unkknown to shoppers, had arranged to burst into song at noon, singing “Hallelujah” from Handel’s Messiah accompanied by the world’s largest pipe organ.

Amazing video. Here’s the link.

Posted in Music, News |  | Leave A Comment

The Source for Parents

Posted on: 11/8/10 8:32 AM | by Jonathan McKee

Okay… I’m getting excited… because our THE SOURCE FOR PARENTS page is almost completely finished. www.TheSource4Parents.com

Let me tell you a little about this fun little project… then I’d love your feedback.

Many of you have already popped over there and snuck a peek at the page recently. It’s been up and running… it’s just had an “under construction” banner up for the last couple months. Well, my web guys actually removed the construction banner this weekend. The page is almost complete. We’re just doing some finishing touches on our ASK THE SOURCE page where parents will be able to write questions and get answers from real parents.

For the last few years, parents have been beginning to take notice of our youth ministry page www.TheSource4YM.com, reading our Youth Culture Window articles, my blog, and using resources like our Slang Dictionary. Youth pastors have been emailing me and telling me, “I send parents to your page all the time!” Our team finally got the idea– Why not a duplicate page, but just for parents!!!

I encourage you to take a peek at this new page. Not only does TheSource4Parents feature some of our THESOURCE FOR YOUTH MINISTRY favorites like the Youth Culture Window articles, our Slang Dictionary and my blog, but we’ve added some other resourceful items unique to parents. These include:

  • MUSIC DISCUSSIONS- these discussions are different than the ones on the 4YM page– these are written specifically for parents who want to use current music as a springboard for discussion with their kids.
  • PARENTING HELP- this page is a gold mine of articles to parents about parenting. I called up some friends in the parenting world and asked them to contribute. So Jim Burns, Wayne Rice, Al Menconi and more have written articles in this section– articles addressing real life parenting issues.
  • MOVIE REVIEW & QUICK Qs- This page not only provides movie reviews, but also supplies three “quick questions” at the end of the review that parents can use to dialogue with their kids about the movie they just saw.
  • PARENTING WORKSHOPS- I have been doing a bunch of parenting workshops across the country.

Take some and click around this page. I’d love to hear your input and thoughts before we officially launch it.

Posted in Internet, News, Parenting |  | Leave A Comment

Talking with Our Kids About Demi

Posted on: 11/2/10 2:56 PM | by Jonathan McKee

So sad… the word is already out that “Sonny with a Chance” star Demi Lovato just checked into rehab for emotional issues, possibly for self mutilation and an eating disorder.

Demi is a huge name with kids, tweens, and even teens. Both of my own girls (13 and 15) have talked about her and seen her show countless times. This news will be a huge blow to kids across the world– yet another Disney Star/role model in rehab.

New York Daily News reports:

Teen Disney star Demi Lovato stunned fans when it was announced that the star had dropped out of her Jonas Brothers tour gig to seek help treatment for “emotional and physical issues,” according to her representatives.

The “Sonny With a Chance” and the “Camp Rock” star has struggled with eating disorders and cutting herself in the past, according to the Associated Press, although it’s unclear if those are the reasons why she left the tour.

Click here for the entire article.

The timing of this is interesting– young people are really struggling with self esteem right now. David’s Youth Culture Window article released just two days ago, The End of Their Rope, an article about bullying-related suicides, was a heart wrenching read. So many young people are looking for belonging and acting out in harmful ways. David offers some great advice about dialoguing with kids regarding bullying, teasing and suicidal thoughts.

As parents or youth workers, we might want to use this news about Demi to talk about self esteem with our young people.

Some resources to talk about this:

We’re in the process of writing up a MUSIC DISCUSSION using Crowder’s song “Everything Glorious” (I talked a little bit about how those lyrics can launch a powerful discussion about self esteem here). We have talked about the subject before– “How do we respond when bad things happen?”  On our MUSIC DISCUSSION page we used The Fray song “You Found Me” to talk about how we can find God in the midst of tragedies. On the same MUSIC DISCUSSION page we also used a song from the artist Ferras, “Hollywood’s Not America,” to talk about the search for fulfillment. Years ago we used a clip from the film “Mean Girls” to talk about self esteem as well, using I Peter chapter 3. January 2009 we talked about girls drinking their problems away. We even discussed that using Pink’s song “So What” here. In that song, Pink reacted in anger and self destruction.

Keep Demi and her family in prayer through this tough time.

(ht to Trazy for sending me the article)

Katy Perry Cut from Sesame Street

Posted on: 09/24/10 2:18 PM | by Jonathan McKee

Some call it controversy… I call it a good decision.

Katy Perry had what Sesame Street called a “play date” with Elmo where she was going to sing her song Hot N’ Cold with the little guy. But Sesame Street made a judgment call: Katy’s dress was too revealing.

Wow. Someone finally takes a stand. Pinch me. Am I dreaming?

Funny… the dress isn’t that revealing, but I can think of about 100 other reasons why I think Katy shouldn’t be on Sesame Street (my thoughts on Katy as a role model here), so I’m not complaining.

I find it funny the way some people in the press are describing Katy. This article contends (emphasis mine), Katy Perry is wholesome enough as modern pop stars go, showing a little skin in her videos and filling hits songs like “I Kissed a Girl,” “California Gurls” and the current “Teenage Dream” with mild sexual innuendo rather than upfont crudity and profanity. But her party-girl persona – or at least her plunging neckline – is apparently too racy for “Sesame Street.”

Sorry… I have to get up off the floor. I fell off my chair laughing. Has this reporter seen Katy’s videos? I’m not sure what crudity is in his dictionary, but what do you call whipped cream cans for breasts squirting all over the place? Or the hand gesture she makes during the words “melt your popsicle” in her California Gurls video? Or, for those of you brave enough, go ahead and click on the music video for “Teenage Dream” and watch it for just 30 seconds between the 2:00 and 2:30 mark. “Mild sexual innuendo,” eh?

It’s a fact. The world’s standards are different than ours.

This interesting CBS video of The Early Show casts some light on the decision making as The Early Show anchors chat with both Elmo and Carol-Lynn Parente, executive producer of Sesame Street.

Katy responded to being “cut” by tweeting: “Wow, looks like my play date with Elmo hs been cut short! If you still wanna play see it at www.KatyPerry.com…”

Katy’s fiance’, actually made a funny. He tweeted, “Today’s Sesame Street will NOT be brought to you by the number 34 or the letter D.”

So Katy and Russell will not hurt at all from the publicity from this incident.

(ht to Todd)